Memorable Quotes.

[Blood Legend]

"I'm going to the observatory deck and I'm drinking my cognac."

An exceedingly lazy mechanic who would do that ONE thing any time shizzno hit the fan. It got to the point where the other players would copy my downtime habits. If the campaign lasted any longer, I'm almost positive "I'm going to the observatory" would have made it in the books whenever anyone had something important to do.

[Judge Death]

One of my favorite characters would always say "I have a theory about this..."

[Peter V. Dell'Orto]

I've got dozens, most of which are only funny to us. I figure the true test of a quote is that it stands without explanation. With that in mind, here are a few from my fantasy game and the name of the player who said them.

Tom:
"The snake - nature's flail."
"A coward dies a thousand deaths. But they are all fake."

Andy:
"We are simple country bandits, pay us no mind."
"You need a zombiotomy."
"He's not a person, he's a mage." (Note - Andy's PC is also a mage)

Sean:
"My zombies ARE happy. Smile, zombies!"

Mike:
"We can't trust him, he's a mage!" "But [Mike], you're a mage." "Right, I should know!"

Me:
"Make HT rolls until you fail."

We write these down when they come up, so I frequently look at my game notes and start laughing uncontrollably.

Here's the best of the bunch terms of summing up my game, said by Andy:
"You fall onto five death checks." In fact, I'm adding that to my sig.

[Blood Legend]

Jake: And to think I was gonna make umteen amount of money as a scientist
Me (GM): Yeah now you'll just die in a hole. Lets get to dying shall we?


This was at the start of the campaign.

Also, this is important information I'd love to share. Dont give your NPCs 30 HP if you dont want them to die a tremendously slow and painful death while the guy with the broomstick figures out he'll never have enough damaging potential to do more than 1 point of damage.

Me: "When was the last time either of you played one of my campaigns where anyone survived?!"

Nate: We need food!
Jake: No we dont.
Nate: And there might be stuff for my burns! And there's knives!
Jake: In a f***ing lunch room?
Nate: I dunno, but these guns suck.

[Mark Caliber]

One of my goals in Role Playing (with my current group) is to get the GM to shoot Diet Pepsi through his nose with a humorous quip.

Sadly this next victory was not mine but I pass it on for your review.


We were in the opening operations of a Medieval siege, and our Dwarven engineer had decided to build a Trebuchet.

This action took quite some time and that player was sidelined for a bit, while other preparations were made in earnest.

Eventually the GM turned back to the player of the Dwarven PC informing him that sufficient time had past for the siege engine to have been completed, and inquired, "What do you want to do now?"

The response was, (in an ooouuuutragious French accent) "Fetche le vasht!"

The GM asked for clarification to which the player repeated, more enthusiastically, "Fetche le vasht!"

I think to gain some time, the GM then turned to his aforementioned elixir of caffeine and took a swig.

In mid drink, his brain made the connection that the Player was quoting the Frenchmen "Fetch the COW!" in Monty Python right before they pitched a cow at the Englishmen with their trebuchet.

Let's face it, Cows and Trebuchets are just a funny combo. And another reason not to quote Monty Python at RP games is that you might accidentally kill the GM! (Fortunately ours only suffered from minor carbonic acid burns to the inner nose.)

[MacGregor]

In a Champions campaign, I was using M&M's as a large crowd of NPC's. About half way through the combat I noticed the crowd had thinned dramatically. I found myself repeatedly yelling at the group, "Quit Eating The Normals !!!"

In retrospect, I probably should have seen that coming.

[HeroPenguin]

What do collecting tissue samples of an unusual monster, rushing into battle with said monsters, and managing to jam an advanced laser pistol in the first combat when testing it all have in common?

They are all perfect opportunities to shout "I'm a scientist!" while playing a dimensional rift research scientist and forcing our resident power armor pilot to choke on his drink as he laughs. The quote is now a recurring presence at the table, though I only said it those three times at the first game.

[Bruno]

One of the most ominous quotes that have come up in our group was the infamous "Here, I won't be needing this." It's become the last words of I think three characters now when all their worst disadvantages proc in the worst possible combination in a bad situation, and the player prepares to go down in flames.

--

It comes from an ill-fated Teenaged Supers campaign, where everyone independently showed up with demonic-related origins, except John, who was a rather normal mutant...

One character "Sue" was an "inter-dimensional refugee" with a sort of crocodile theme going. She normally was a scaly, four armed, fanged, tailed, regenerating monster, but she could transform into a plain looking teen girl. She had the motivations of a crocodile, and utterly failed at blending into human society, so one member of the super team or another was always assigned as a 'babysitter' to make sure she didn't accidentally blow everyones secret ID. It had been impressed very FIRMLY on her that the secret identities are VERY IMPORTANT and she was NOT to give them away UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.

One day "Sue" and John are in line in the cafeteria for lunch when another student sidles up and stage whispers to John "I know what you really are..." and then scoots off out of the cafeteria.

"Sue" gives John her lunch money, saying "Here, I won't be needing this," and follows the kid out of the caf. John, foolishly, did NOT follow her, because he was hungry and wanted lunch. He was also very very confused as to why he suddenly got "Sue"'s lunch money.

So was his player and the other players; the GM, however, knows the long list of mental disadvantages on "Sue"s character sheet (many of which he suggested as required for the character concept) and watched her player blow a string of rolls.

"Sue" follows the kid onto the bus as he travels home for lunch, and follows him all the way to his house, where she promptly kills and eats him in his back yard.

Long story short, the players held an impromptu meeting, where character sheets were compared, and realized that everyone except John had severe personality and supernatural problems.

The campaign was deliberately aborted by the players.

[Not another shrubbery]

Originally Posted by Bruno

"Sue" gives John her lunch money, saying "Here, I won't be needing this," and follows the kid out of the caf.

Sort of a different slant on "famous last words" :/

[Blood Legend]

Originally Posted by Not another shrubbery

Sort of a different slant on "famous last words" :/

Yeah, especially with all the surviving. That perfectly fits the mood of the thread of course. :D