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Old 11-20-2010, 05:07 PM   #41
Christopher R. Rice
 
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Default Re: Talent: Maker of things that go boom

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Originally Posted by Flyndaran View Post
But you're always left with extra plutonium and three screws.
And never have all the tools you need?

:P
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Old 11-21-2010, 08:17 AM   #42
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Default Re: Talent: Maker of things that go boom

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Originally Posted by Ghostdancer View Post
And never have all the tools you need?

:P
AFAIK IKEA has stopped shipping tools in the flat pack, at least IKEA here doesn't do it. You have to use your own tools, so it's your own damn fault for not having the proper tools for the job.
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Old 11-21-2010, 09:29 AM   #43
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Default Re: Talent: Maker of things that go boom

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Originally Posted by Žorkell View Post
AFAIK IKEA has stopped shipping tools in the flat pack, at least IKEA here doesn't do it. You have to use your own tools, so it's your own damn fault for not having the proper tools for the job.
I have one wrench. And it has suited my needs... of adjusting bike seats quite well. ;)
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Old 11-21-2010, 09:41 AM   #44
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Default Re: Talent: Maker of things that go boom

Get yourself one of those fold-out allen wrench sets. They allow you to adjust just about everything on your bike and can double as the solution for all IKEA related issues.

I've never been 80 miles from home and trailing the rest of the group when my handlebars loosened up requiring a side-of-the-road fix or a very long walk home. But I still keep that little gem in my back pocket when riding. it was closer to 90 miles out
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Old 11-21-2010, 10:39 AM   #45
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Default Re: Talent: Maker of things that go boom

Tvtropes even have an entire section on IKEAErotica. Completely work-safe, of course.
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Old 11-21-2010, 10:48 PM   #46
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Default Re: Talent: Maker of things that go boom

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Originally Posted by lexington View Post
If there's an timer counting down every yard you travel divides the damage you're going to take by three. Effective fleeing is the hallmark of a living, er, good demolition man.
There was a real story from the WWII UXB files.

Apparently the German aerial-delivered mine had a delay fuse. If it starts hissing you have seventeen seconds to escape before a ton of HE goes active. Briefly, if loudly.

One deactivation expert apparently hit the wrong widget when working on such a mine. He came out of the hole (note that he was wearing some web gear and combat boots) and made a measured 180 yards in that time.

Now, IIRC, the Olympic record for such a distance is more than 17 seconds.

Of course, perhaps the fuse was running a bit slow, which is not what we could say about the demolitions man in question.

He did, according to witnesses, hurdle a six foot high fence without touching it at all nor breaking stride.

Of course, they might have not been the best observers as they were heading for cover without being ordered. Go figure.

As the T-shirt said, "I am an Explosive Ordnance Technician. If you see me running, try to keep up."
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Old 11-21-2010, 10:52 PM   #47
Christopher R. Rice
 
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Default Re: Talent: Maker of things that go boom

Quote:
Originally Posted by fredtheobviouspseudonym View Post
There was a real story from the WWII UXB files.

Apparently the German aerial-delivered mine had a delay fuse. If it starts hissing you have seventeen seconds to escape before a ton of HE goes active. Briefly, if loudly.

One deactivation expert apparently hit the wrong widget when working on such a mine. He came out of the hole (note that he was wearing some web gear and combat boots) and made a measured 180 yards in that time.

Now, IIRC, the Olympic record for such a distance is more than 17 seconds.

Of course, perhaps the fuse was running a bit slow, which is not what we could say about the demolitions man in question.

He did, according to witnesses, hurdle a six foot high fence without touching it at all nor breaking stride.

Of course, they might have not been the best observers as they were heading for cover without being ordered. Go figure.

As the T-shirt said, "I am an Explosive Ordnance Technician. If you see me running, try to keep up."
That's brilliant, where did you find that little gem?

My cousin Santos has that T-shirt, he works for the Richmond bomb squad. That and a bobomb from Mario brothers.
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Old 11-24-2010, 03:08 PM   #48
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Default Re: Talent: Maker of things that go boom

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Originally Posted by fredtheobviouspseudonym View Post
Now, IIRC, the Olympic record for such a distance is more than 17 seconds.
Olympic athletes might get better results if the starting line is about to explode.
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Old 11-24-2010, 04:42 PM   #49
RobKamm
 
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Default Re: Talent: Maker of things that go boom

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Originally Posted by sir_pudding View Post
Olympic athletes might get better results if the starting line is about to explode.
How to improve ratings at the Olympics...

Note, they only have to think the line might explode. All you'd need to do is blow it up at a qualifying round or two to plant the seeds.
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