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#121 |
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: The Fine Line Between Black and White
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Hempy the Dire Sheep finally made it into one of my games. One of the players was being hosed due a series of bad GM rolls and a few comical choices when I'd decided "ya know, your life can't get any worse."
Hempy appeared in the game shortly after the hunter was running away from various other demi-godly threats and I felt one more encounter with the otherwordly would suit. Sullivan approached, his character exhausted, his player in a mild euphoria caused from asphyxiation from the insurmountable gouts of laughter caused by misfortune just prior, raises his flail up on high over the head of what appeared to be a normal and undefending sheep. He strikes straight and true - only to fall into the endless 'sheep-space" within Hempy's fluff. His legs humorously sticking out of the sheep. The harmless demi-god sheep then continued on to torture the wayward adventurer while he attempted to hunt down a deer, letting off mind unhinging dire-bleets whenever Sullivan had a clear shot, spooking said deer, then proceeding to fly off like a paperbag in a light updraft. Hempy did this a few more times following. The first two attempts on the deer's life were interrupted by the bleet of a sheep that had positioned itself directly behind Sullivan as he prepared his shots. The third, Hempy appeared 'in front' of Sullivan while he checked his rear for the blasted sheepy, only to take a bleet in the face. His fourth attempt on the deer's life would be interrupted by Hempy as it floated down in front of Sullivans view, landing behind the deer and bleeting, once again, its dire bleet of bleety bleetdom, forcing the deer to take flight of foot into the dense forest. Hempy's nature, being the inside joke of a one-shot that only involved 3 of the 5 players from a prior game meant that only 2 of the people at the table were incapacitated with laughter while the other two smiled confused at the supernatural events that took place, and the sight of an asthmatic reaching for his inhaler. Memorable Quote of the day: A morbidly deep toned "BL-E-E-E-E-E-EET."
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. ( )( ) -This is The Overlord Bunny o(O.o)o -Master of Bunnies O('')('') -And Destroyer of the Hasenpfeffer "This is the sort of relatively small error that destroys planetary probes." ~Bruno Last edited by Blood Legend; 12-28-2007 at 02:30 AM. |
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#122 | |
Petitioner: Word of IN Filk
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Longmont, CO
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“It's not railroading if you offer the PCs tickets and they stampede to the box office, waving their money. Metaphorically speaking” --Elizabeth McCoy, In Nomine Line Editor Author: "What Doesn't Kill Me Makes Me Stronger" Last edited by johndallman; 01-07-2023 at 05:23 PM. Reason: Fix quoting |
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#123 |
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: The Fine Line Between Black and White
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Well, you're welcome :D
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. ( )( ) -This is The Overlord Bunny o(O.o)o -Master of Bunnies O('')('') -And Destroyer of the Hasenpfeffer "This is the sort of relatively small error that destroys planetary probes." ~Bruno |
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#124 |
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Omaha NE
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Supers game (Champions), everyone was describing their characters to the other players. One of the male players was describing his female brick. What he intended to say was that she had a special attack a la The Hulk, she claps her hands together and the soundwave knocks people over. What he actually said was "And I have the Thunderclap!"
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#125 |
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Earth, mostly
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Of course, the usual method of getting the Thunderclap involves sleeping with Thor...
("You're thor?? I'm tho thor, I can't pith!")
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If you break the laws of Man, you go to prison. If you break the laws of God, you go to Hell. If you break the laws of Physics, you go to Sweden and receive a Nobel Prize. |
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#126 |
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Omaha NE
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Good one, IW :) . I'm afraid we were all laughing too hard to come up with post-worthy responses.
(And to be fair, the player in question is fundamentalist Christian, and it's entirely possible he didn't know the other meaning of "clap" until this incident.) Edit: almost forgot -- not a quote, but one bit of laughter at a different Champions game came about as the heroes entered a shopping mall. I'm running a speedster in that game. When I noticed that we were entering through a department store, I asked if Speedster Tricks would let me get through the store without being squirted by the perfume sales clerks. Last edited by Koshka; 12-30-2007 at 08:48 AM. Reason: added story |
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#127 |
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Isanti, MN
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At Gencon Indy last summer, I was running an "Iron GM" session, with three sourcebooks (including Illuminati). So, anyway, the players were in 1950's Egypt, investigating a body that looked just like the US president, Ike. They decided to take the body back to New York with them. Went something like this:
Me: OK, it's easy enough for you to buy tickets for yourselves from Cairo to Berlin, then from there to New York. How do you plan on moving the body? One player: (mumbles something incoherent) call UCS! Me: (strange look at player) Player: United Corpse Service Have the tee shirt to prove it and everything... ;-) Front Back |
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#128 |
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Gothenburg, Sweden
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My wizard had been slightly stunned by failing the Contact Outer Plane spell - turning him into a high-level commoner for 5 weeks - and currently had Intelligence 8 and Charisma 8. But we were attacked by assassins and trashed them, whereupon the city guard turned up and asked us what the hell we were doing.
Me: "They cast the first stone" *mimics holding up something* GM: "What's that?" Me: "The first stone."
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“When you arise in the morning think of what a privilege it is to be alive, to think, to enjoy, to love ...” Marcus Aurelius Author of Winged Folk. The GURPS Discord. Drop by and say hi! |
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#129 |
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Boston area
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The other night in our Shadowrun campaign -- things had gotten kind of hot in Seattle. Some characters left town for Denver, others retired and the players created new ones in Denver. The folks starting in Seattle were offered a job and were told that some locals in Denver would show us around and assist. When the immigrants met the locals and the local fixer, the locals were a bit loathe to take the job. The fixer said, "Come on, guys, it's not just a job." And I chimed in, "No, it's an adventure."
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Sex is nobody's business but the three people involved. And the shop where they bought the equipment. |
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#130 |
Forum Pervert
(If you have to ask . . .) Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Somewhere high up.
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New Player: "Do I need to worry about falling?"
Me: "Only if you don't like that sudden stop at the end." Gummißear: "I need a big figure. Unless you have something new for me to use." Me: "MonkeyFist doesn't let me bring my new figures. He doesn't like you using them against us." |
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Tags |
actual play, funny |
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