Memorable Quotes.

[LostPassWord]

This is from my D&D3.5 game. A player was introducing a new character after his had died. The new character, he decided, would be a drunkard. As part of the group's D&D new character introduction, he was asked the standard question of if he, the character, would want to be brought back to life if he died. The character replied "Yes, but if you can't, bury me with my wine."

[Mark Skarr]

Discussing a Weird War II game:

Me: The party would be members of the resistance in France.
Raven: Do we have to be French?
Me: No. You could be American, British, Norwegian . . . lots of things.
Raven: Oooh, I could be a Viking Werewolf!
Me: Yeah. But you will need to be able to read and speak French, at least at a broken level.
Raven: Makes sense . . . check skills.
Me: Um, French is an advantage.
Raven: I wouldn't consider it an advantage to be French. A disadvantage: social sigma, OPH . . ..
Me: I meant the language is an advantage.
Raven: Oh, yeah!

[Blood Legend]

Originally Posted by Mark Skarr

Discussing a Weird War II game:

Me: The party would be members of the resistance in France.
Raven: Do we have to be French?
Me: No. You could be American, British, Norwegian . . . lots of things.
Raven: Oooh, I could be a Viking Werewolf!
Me: Yeah. But you will need to be able to read and speak French, at least at a broken level.
Raven: Makes sense . . . check skills.
Me: Um, French is an advantage.
Raven: I wouldn't consider it an advantage to be French. A disadvantage: social sigma, OPH . . ..
Me: I meant the language is an advantage.
Raven: Oh, yeah!

Ha! I wasn't drinking soda this time!

Now I have to explain to my parents why I'm cackling in the middle of the night.

[Gilboron]

After several role-playing sessions using GURPS:

Me: "So, I just bought a new GURPS book-"
My friend: "What's GURPS?"

This is no joke.

[c2h5oh]

Some years ago, I was in a group spending the day playing Paranoia. Towards the end, the GM made up his mind that one of the players, who had been irritating him, was going to lose a clone.

GM: Well, there's a 5% chance of you dying. Role a d20.
Player: [shake, rattle, role]. Hah! A 17. I'm safe!
GM: 17? That's just the number I was thinking of!

I believe the official Paranoia term for this was "hosed."

[Bruno]

One of the downsides (upsides?) of playing a dim character is trying to imagine what he makes of the other PC's casual conversation. You can't just sit around in quiet confusion, because then you get left out of all the noncombat scenes...

Scene: Online game through OpenRPG. We're trying to find the Tomb of the Blood Baron, but the bloody Baron has a whole bunch of false tombs hidden in the wilderness...

Singeon: "The real one is better hidden, I bet, so you see the fakes first. Like a campflage."
Singeon: "or camoflage, as it is sometimes called."
Singeon: "It like the old riddle, where do you hide a tree? in a forest."
Mrugnak: "Mrugnak know cammo. Dat not cammo, dat like... um... eggs."
Singeon: "Eggs?"
Mrugnak: "Eggs!"


I watch as all the typing indicators come to a dead stop. And then there's this sudden storm as EVERYONE starts typing at once.

Mordreona: "I could eat."
Singeon: "Right! Eggs! Huh?"
Mrugnak: "It like, der berd got lotta eggs, ya?"
GM: ((GM loses it))
Lenia: ((Loses it angry, or loses it laughing? >.>))
Mrugnak: "So den snake eat some egg, rat eat some egg, men take some egg... but berd still got more eggs in nest."
Singeon: "Back to camp, peoples."
Mrugnak: "An den der little birdies!"
GM: ((can't type, laughing))
Mordreona: "Good we should have a rest and eat, while I look this place over good."
Lenia: ((Good work, Mrugnak. You broke the GM.))

[ziresta]

Kaz, the pyromaniac gargoyle pyromancer identifying a Potion of Fire Resistance: "EVIL! It's an evil potion of doom!! Seriously, it'll curse you."

[Professor Phobos]

The players have followed a suspected diabolist to an Italian restaraunt during the night, and are observing a blasphemous cult ritual being performed in the kitchen.

Soon, a hideous demon appears out of smoke and fire.

The demon-summoner approaches the demon and says..."Alright, Malfeggor, you'll be on dish-washing duty until you're cleared for the grill...now we're old fashioned wood stove here. You have an experience with one of those before?"

It is stuff like this that made running a Buffy game so very rewarding.

[BLloyd607502]

In a Victorian RP with half tha players as Bowstreet runners and Half as Gangs people
PC1 HAd been captured by the bowstreet runners half way though a Crime (B&E on the Bowstreet runners Police station) and they knew he was guilty for Several other worse crimes (Murders, mostly of Bowstreet runners)
He was in the cell waiting interrigation.
PC1 (Criminal): *Playing a tune on the Bars with a Spoon.*
PC2 (The current head of the PC group, head of police (All the Non-PC Police had been murdered): *Walks in and grabs the spoon* Hello you grubby, Theiving, murderous B******...So...How many of my comrads have you killed...?"
PC1: OOOC: He can't take a verbal Statment can he without mesigning it, no recording Machines.
GM: Nope.
PC1: *Grins* Well...Two last night...Three last week...Give me a moment...*Works it out on his fingers*...about 15...including some of your Grubby Orpahns cop. *Grin* ...and you'll never prove it either
PC2: *Been sitting there writing*...Well...Thats all I need.
PC1:...What...you're not going to torture me?...Try and make me confess or anything?
PC2: Nope. It's all good....Oh...Just so you know what we're going to do...*Yells out the door* Bring in the Witness.
PC1: OOOC: Witness...But...No one saw me
GM: No...They didn't (To PC1) What Witness?
PC1: OOOC: You'll see IC
*PC3 (Another Cop) And PC4 (A Orphan girl aged 7 working for the runners)*
PC2: You recognise her *Points at PC4*
PC1: OOOC: Do I?
GM:...No *Confused*
PC2: Well...you should...*Looks at PC4 points at PC1.* You recognise him?
PC4: Yes, he raped me...
GM & PC 1: WHAT?!?!
PC2: OOOC: Well...I have Craft Evidence and she has Acting...
GM:...Hahahaha
PC4: *Does a big Description with PC1 brining out 'evidence'. PC1 is very pale and GM laughs all the way through, they have 'Evidence' For murder, rape, theft, GBH and Even a small bit of Treason.*
PC2: ...Now...You can either have this list...and hang...or admit to what you did...and Hang...Your choice, but at least you'll hang for what you did if you confess it...
PC1: You can't do this...It's ridicuous. You'll never get away with it
PC2: *VEry cheery* Yes we can, it's your words against all of ours and the word of one sweet little orphan who you held down and ravished in a back ally two weeks ago and left to die...
PC1:...You...you...
PC3: *Smiles* I know, he's great isn't he...Nice one boss.
*PC2 and 3 High five*
PC4: ...Can I have a lolly pop now please
PC2: *Hands over a Bag of mint humbugs*
PC1: You sold a mans life for a bag of humbugs
PC4: *Shrugs*...you killed 15 of my friends...I'd of done it for free but the Commander said he had to give me something...
PC2: Right, The Courts will be open in...3 hours...the jury will take...30 inutes to get together...the case will take...1 hour and then 15 seconds for the Verdict...we'll probably have you on the block by...hmm...10 O'Clock, I'd offer you a last meal ...but...I really wouldn't waste a BAcon SAndwhich on you...See you on the chop Block *WInks and walks off with PC3 and 4, douses the candles on the way out*
PC1:...*10 minutes later*...F***
GM: *Can't talk for laughing*
PC2: *Points at the other Gang PCs and mouths 'You're next'*

[Gamer_Zer0]

a little back gorund on this one from a star wars game the PC is playing a nobel,who never knew his farther and he is helping jedi escape the purge when the pcs run into vadar.

Pc1: "You think he might be my daddy?"
Pc2: "No,i definelty don't think so."
Pc1: "You sure,I mean we can't even see his face."
pc3: "Considering that he most likely plans to kill all of us,i seriously doubt he is your farther.'
pc4: I think we better go before he notices us."
pc1 *runs out of hiding place and stops 40 ft away from vadar* "Did you have any kids you aboned at a young age?"