Memorable Quotes.

[Blood Legend]

This thread is a humor thread like "2000 things" or "famous last words" except different.

What memorable quotes have you or your friends created, and what event were they tied to at that moment?

My latest adventure involved being stuck on a space craft. A frigate comparably not well suited for combat. The enemy ship was roughly the same size as ours. Except it had Particle Beams, godly anti-missile capability, and a shield that could take a nuke. My ship was of course, packed with missiles. After 2 volleys from 2 frigates, in roughly the #40's range worth of missiles, it was reported that only 5 made it through, and that the shield had barely flickered while the rest of the missiles were taken out in a quick flash of light from the particle beams.

I was on deck, commanding the frigate Lawson. The Communcations officer turns to me with a recommended course of action. I reply:

"Quick, call fleet command, we've got a GM's wet dream on our hands!"

[whswhs]

Originally Posted by Blood Legend

What memorable quotes have you or your friends created, and what event where they tied to at that moment?

"You mean I can't shoot my own prisoner in my own studio with my own gun?"

Bill Stoddard

[GhostInTheMachine]

PC1: "I'll throw a surgeons tool at him(PC2)."
GM: "You start to pick up a rusty scalpel from the table..."
PC1&2: "NO!"

~PC 1 in the process of finding PC 2 who is trapped in-between dimensions in an odd cadaver drawer in a morgue of an insane asylum abandoned in the middle of the Vermont woods 2 days from civilization.

[Redcrow]

The characters in our Shadowrun group are invited to a private dinner by a (suspicious) new contact. As paranoia was abundant among this particular group the dinner began something like this...

PC 1(Mage): I Astrally Perceive the food.
GM: Its magically delicious!

[Bruno]

While infiltrating the Temple of Elemental Evil, a rogue backstabs an NPC for a one-hit-one-kill. The DM described an absolutely goary scene that resulted in most of the party being sprayed with blood.

The body was hid, and we continued into the Temple, but were stopped by a patrol of guards (who were far more capable of dealing with us than one unsuspecting NPC)...

Before they had a chance to say anything, one player quips: "Oh, sorry about the blood on the carpet. We just got back from the human sacrifice."

I've had players in a modern game carry medieval weapons onto public transit, and when challenged they said "Well of course it's an axe. We're on our way to a LARP."

I'm sure there are more, but I can't remember them right now. I'll get back to you when they come to mind.

[Mark Skarr]

"I pull the pin and throw the ewok!"

PC1: "Ninjas? Bah! Ninjas are a dime a dozen!"
PC2: "Then somebody went and spent about 20 bucks!"

Upon witnessing Jessica getting smacked and her uncontrolled change into a flock of 33 ravens:
Me: "I can't heal birds!"

Me: "Oh, no. We're not here to protect them. We're here to protect you from them."

[sgtcallistan]

After a natural 20 mailed backfist to the 'nads, the villain was hauled out and over the knights' horse. As the villain's mercenaries boiled out of the guardhouse, the knight shouts:
'This man pays your wages! One step closer and he dies!'
-as they thought about it, we took off on horseback and escaped with the villain. Later found the mercs ransacked the castle and dispersed. Victory all round, the GM dropped ten pages of a fight and pursuit scenario in the waste paper basket in protest.

Then there was the time the whole party were hit with a confuse spell, or some hallucinogenic effect, I forget.
Party: 'Uhhh...'
Squeaky voice from nowhere: 'Candyfloss, sir?'
All: 'Oh, thank you...' (Geek points to be won!)

[johndallman]

Originally Posted by Mark Skarr

Me: "Oh, no. We're not here to protect them. We're here to protect you from them."

PC "We're taking you into protective custody."

NPC "Protection from who?"

PC "Ah... us, mostly."

[Furabo]

Just an old staple: "Kill it before it multiplies!"

Then there is an example of miscommunication at the role-playing table:

The paladin is welcomed by the princess.

GM--in role as excitable young princess: "Be at ease, sir knight! Please--take off your helmet!"

Player--Out of Character: "It is off."

GM--Out of Character: "Oh."



Of course, the other players preferred their interpretation of the scene:

Princess (excited and pleased): "Be at ease, sir knight! Please--take off your helmet!"

Paladin: "It is off."

Princess (disappointed): "Oh."

[Blood Legend]

Originally Posted by Furabo

Of course, the other players preferred their interpretation of the scene:

Princess (excited and pleased): "Be at ease, sir knight! Please--take off your helmet!"

Paladin: "It is off."

Princess (disappointed): "Oh."

I saw that coming a mile away, but it's still funny as hell.