most humorous GURPS moments you've had? - Page 2

hackbarth · 12-07-2009, 01:22 PM

One of my players was sort of a munchkin, annoying the other players. He played a amoral Elf Mage, and wanted the most powerful familiars that he could get, a pegasus and a wolf, with all the familiar options.

After much negotiation (and whining) I conceded, as by the rules, I rolled the dice, hidden from him, but my other players got to see the result: Critical failure, then critical failure again! The familiars would turn to be demons in disguise!

The players smiled and the munchkin asked what was on, so I told him grinning: You rolled two criticals, you got both familiars with +1 IQ!

We played a fairly long campaign, and the players never complained the all the problems that the familiars brought, because the oblivious Mage always suffered so much more than them for their antics. Only when his character died (and was dragged to hell by his familiars - don't cry about it, at that point it was a deserved fate for the character) the players told him the truth about the rolls.

torishmiaka · 12-10-2009, 06:01 AM

i dont know where to start for fun moments in a long term campaign that i play in.

I think one was another character in the game critically passing erotic arts and seducing the person who held her captive.

another was my character critiacally failing animal comunication when i decided to try and delfault it as well, and ending up trying to get away from undead wolves (in the not so pleasent way)

I cant remeber some of the other things we have done, but i know we get extra points every time we break the GM

LemmingLord · 12-10-2009, 06:20 AM

I ran a lycanthropes game that included intrigue and infighting...

One character was a were-bat with the delusion that he was a vampire and an assassin wannabe...

One character was a were-tiger, combat monstrosity (total wimp on the human side).

One character was a were-giant-scorpion.

So the assassin in paid to kill off the were-tiger. Shouldn't be an issue since the assassin is doing the cooking for the group. He ponders the amount of poison it will take, making some poison rolls. I let him know that the problem with poisions and lycanthropes is that as soon as it starts becoming life threatenning that it will cause a shapeshift - so he needs to use enough based on the weight of the shapeshifted form.

Now the assassin decides he wants to test the poison on the were-giant-scorpion, whose animal form he judges to be the same weight as the were-tiger animal form. He decides this, I do believe, because the were-scorpion character is clearly a glutton and cannot refuse seconds. SO - for the first bowl of food, he puts enough poison to kill 1 man. No obvious affect. (I picture the character noting this in a notebook). Second bowl, he adds 3 times the amount.. No effect. Then ten times the amount. No effect.. Finally, with the were-scorpion very full, he decides he better just throw in "the rest of the poison" containing 100x the human dosage into the bowl for the were-tiger...

NOW the issue here is that the were-giant-scorpion template has Immunity to poison.... With each dose doing 3d damage the first minute and another 3d damage every minute thereafter with each failed ht roll we calculate at least 100 dice damage.. Sorry man.. You are so dead.

panton41 · 12-10-2009, 06:45 AM

It's been decades, but we were doing a 3rd Ed. Space game and I gave the computer a bad attitude and vendetta against the ship's captain (think Holly from Red Dwarf rather than HAL 9000). It's been a very long time, but I seem to recall something about the computer only producing food that was green and tasted like butterscotch pudding.

MacGregor · 12-10-2009, 08:34 AM

The group was trying to hamper a 1000 orc hoard, so the half-orc witch-doctor got his hands on some elven hallucinogenic mushrooms, marched into the orc army, beat up the head shaman, and convinced the orc leader that he had magical mushrooms of STRENTH. Just before the battle the orc leader took them, insisted that all his generals take some, and of course, so should the witch-doctor. By the end of the battle he was so stoned he couldn't tell the bad guys from his companions and was running away from everybody!

And

This isn't Gurps, but...

Played a D&D bard (sung to the tune of 'Wheels on the Bus'.)

The orcs in our path will die upon our swords, die upon our swords, die upon our swords!
The orcs in our path will die upon our swords, screaming all the whillllllle!

MacGregor · 12-10-2009, 08:47 AM

Just remembered another one. Female elf takes Fear of Heights. One day the group is climbing down long vertical shaft in some nameless mountain. To combat the fear, they had her wrapped up like a mummy so she couldn't see anything and lowered her down. Then part of the wrapping slipped, she saw where she was, we rolled on the fright chart, and got 'lose your lunch'. 1st person dodges out of the way. 2nd person dodges out of the way. Desert warrior fails the dodge and gets it in the face.
About a year later they're walking down a path, on the side of a wall of a huge underground cavern. Her eyes are closed and she's being led step by step by (who else,) the desert warrior. She slips, sees where she is, rolls on the fright chart, and gets 'lose your lunch', right in the warriors face, who can't do anything about it right then cause he's still got to help her to the bottom.

I just love it when a player takes a fear!

Jasonft · 12-10-2009, 09:32 AM

Fairly standard fantasy campaign, simple little act of getting a healing potion down someone's throat while they were unconscious. I botch the roll and he wakes up convinced I am trying to kill him, yells "Assassin!" while reaching for my throat, then collapses unconscious again.

Became a bit of a running gag that campaign, and is still remembered fondly years later by myself and the other person.

"Assassin!" *thud*

rosignol · 12-10-2009, 10:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Johnny Angel

Are there any particular GURPS moments which you've had that were humorous?

Scenario: PCs have been captured, enslaved, and sent to the salt mines.

PC #1 persuades PC #2 to distract the guards so he can grab a weapon and attack. Plan works, PC #1 gets his hands on a pickaxe... and proceeds to turn it blunt-side-towards-enemy before hitting the guard in the head.

The attack was ineffective, the guard quickly summons reinforcements, PC #2 is severely beaten, PC #1 takes a critical hit from a guard with an axe and loses a leg.

When all is said and done, PC #2 turns to PC #1 and asks why on earth he struck the guard with the blunt side of the pickaxe instead of the pointy end.

The answer: "I'm a pacifist".

PC #1 was quickly dubbed "Hopalong Pacifist", and was retired shortly afterward (none of the other PCs were willing to chip in to have his leg regenerated).

Threlgar · 12-10-2009, 12:58 PM

*lol* I have got one from that very same direction...

The players captured an enemy spy.

Player#1: We can´t let him live. Given time, he will escape and give away our plans.
Player#2: I´m not going to let you kill him.
Player#1: Why do you always have to take Pacifism to get some extra points ? You are no pacifist.
Player#2: I am not. But my Character is. At least, he has Pacifism (Cannot kill). So, why don´t we just cut his hamstrings ? He is not going to go anywhere then...

Xipe_Totec · 12-11-2009, 01:52 AM

Oh, I just LOOOOOOOOOOOVE Pacifists. :D

First GURPS game evah - we were testing the system with a one-shot military scenario - invading a terrorist camp and getting some hostages out. One player tried to do a McGuyver-type character, who disliked guns and was a pacifist (yeah, I know - IN THE ARMY... but that was our first go, so...).

So, first thing he does is, when he spotted a sentry approaching, is leave a toolbox aside, and then throw a magnet at it - to cause noise and have him go check it out. So, the guard turns, PC rises, and tries to knock him out with a wrench. THUD - roll HT=5... nop, not unconcious. THUD - roll HT=7... nop, not unconscious. THUD - roll HT=8... nop, not uncoscious. THUD - HT fail, ok, "you've finally knocked down a person after hitting him 4 times over the head with a monkey wrench - very pacifistic of you".

Game continues, they infiltrate, same PC comes upon a sentry taking a leak, and tries to rinse and repeat. Unfortunately, fails a stealth roll, and the sentry turns around, and places 2 bullets in his chest from a revolver. PC falls down, and sentry shoots the other 4 bullets (some hitting him, some not). Another PC approached the scene (after they basically cleaned everything else up) and is watching the sentry holding the first PC down, and loading rounds in the revolver. All the while I'm asking the other PC will he take the sentry down (sneaky-type, has silenced weapon with a laser-sight and took his sweet time aiming, ergo could take him down easily). The following goes on:

SENTRY: *Loads a round*
GM->PC2: "Want to take him down?"
PC2: "Not yet."
SENTRY: *Loads a second round*
GM->PC2: "Want to take him down?"
PC2: "Not yet."
SENTRY: *Loads a third round*
GM->PC2: "Want to take him down?"
PC2: "Not yet."
SENTRY: *Spins the drum, closes the gun and primes the trigger*
GM->PC2: "Want to take him down?"
PC2: "Not yet."
SENTRY: *CLICK*
GM->PC2: "Want to take him down?"
PC2: "Not yet."
SENTRY: *CLICK*
GM->PC2: "Want to take him down?"
PC2: "Not yet."
SENTRY: *BLAM!!!!*
GM->PC2: "Want to take him down now?"
PC2: "Hm..... not yet."
SENTRY: *BLAM!!!!"
GM->PC2: "How about now? PC1 is at -2xHT, he could die."
PC2: "Hm...... ok, fine. I shoot the bad guy." *BLAM!!!*
SENTRY: *dies*

Checking the recovery roll afterwards, PC1 spent a lot of time in the hospital and out of the game. The other 2 PCs said the next few sessions would be the best they had in a while. :)

Must I mention the PC1 wasn't univesally liked? ;)

12-07-2009, 01:22 PM	#11
hackbarth Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Brasilia, Brazil	Re: most humorous GURPS moments you've had? One of my players was sort of a munchkin, annoying the other players. He played a amoral Elf Mage, and wanted the most powerful familiars that he could get, a pegasus and a wolf, with all the familiar options. After much negotiation (and whining) I conceded, as by the rules, I rolled the dice, hidden from him, but my other players got to see the result: Critical failure, then critical failure again! The familiars would turn to be demons in disguise! The players smiled and the munchkin asked what was on, so I told him grinning: You rolled two criticals, you got both familiars with +1 IQ! We played a fairly long campaign, and the players never complained the all the problems that the familiars brought, because the oblivious Mage always suffered so much more than them for their antics. Only when his character died (and was dragged to hell by his familiars - don't cry about it, at that point it was a deserved fate for the character) the players told him the truth about the rolls. __________________ See my GCS Templates and GURPS Articles at my GURPS page.

12-10-2009, 06:01 AM	#12
torishmiaka Join Date: May 2009	Re: most humorous GURPS moments you've had? i dont know where to start for fun moments in a long term campaign that i play in. I think one was another character in the game critically passing erotic arts and seducing the person who held her captive. another was my character critiacally failing animal comunication when i decided to try and delfault it as well, and ending up trying to get away from undead wolves (in the not so pleasent way) I cant remeber some of the other things we have done, but i know we get extra points every time we break the GM

12-10-2009, 06:20 AM	#13
LemmingLord Join Date: Jul 2005	Re: most humorous GURPS moments you've had? I ran a lycanthropes game that included intrigue and infighting... One character was a were-bat with the delusion that he was a vampire and an assassin wannabe... One character was a were-tiger, combat monstrosity (total wimp on the human side). One character was a were-giant-scorpion. So the assassin in paid to kill off the were-tiger. Shouldn't be an issue since the assassin is doing the cooking for the group. He ponders the amount of poison it will take, making some poison rolls. I let him know that the problem with poisions and lycanthropes is that as soon as it starts becoming life threatenning that it will cause a shapeshift - so he needs to use enough based on the weight of the shapeshifted form. Now the assassin decides he wants to test the poison on the were-giant-scorpion, whose animal form he judges to be the same weight as the were-tiger animal form. He decides this, I do believe, because the were-scorpion character is clearly a glutton and cannot refuse seconds. SO - for the first bowl of food, he puts enough poison to kill 1 man. No obvious affect. (I picture the character noting this in a notebook). Second bowl, he adds 3 times the amount.. No effect. Then ten times the amount. No effect.. Finally, with the were-scorpion very full, he decides he better just throw in "the rest of the poison" containing 100x the human dosage into the bowl for the were-tiger... NOW the issue here is that the were-giant-scorpion template has Immunity to poison.... With each dose doing 3d damage the first minute and another 3d damage every minute thereafter with each failed ht roll we calculate at least 100 dice damage.. Sorry man.. You are so dead. __________________ Villain's Round Table

12-10-2009, 08:34 AM	#15
MacGregor Join Date: Jun 2005	Re: most humorous GURPS moments you've had? The group was trying to hamper a 1000 orc hoard, so the half-orc witch-doctor got his hands on some elven hallucinogenic mushrooms, marched into the orc army, beat up the head shaman, and convinced the orc leader that he had magical mushrooms of STRENTH. Just before the battle the orc leader took them, insisted that all his generals take some, and of course, so should the witch-doctor. By the end of the battle he was so stoned he couldn't tell the bad guys from his companions and was running away from everybody! And This isn't Gurps, but... Played a D&D bard (sung to the tune of 'Wheels on the Bus'.) The orcs in our path will die upon our swords, die upon our swords, die upon our swords! The orcs in our path will die upon our swords, screaming all the whillllllle!

12-10-2009, 08:47 AM	#16
MacGregor Join Date: Jun 2005	Re: most humorous GURPS moments you've had? Just remembered another one. Female elf takes Fear of Heights. One day the group is climbing down long vertical shaft in some nameless mountain. To combat the fear, they had her wrapped up like a mummy so she couldn't see anything and lowered her down. Then part of the wrapping slipped, she saw where she was, we rolled on the fright chart, and got 'lose your lunch'. 1st person dodges out of the way. 2nd person dodges out of the way. Desert warrior fails the dodge and gets it in the face. About a year later they're walking down a path, on the side of a wall of a huge underground cavern. Her eyes are closed and she's being led step by step by (who else,) the desert warrior. She slips, sees where she is, rolls on the fright chart, and gets 'lose your lunch', right in the warriors face, who can't do anything about it right then cause he's still got to help her to the bottom. I just love it when a player takes a fear!

12-10-2009, 09:32 AM	#17
Jasonft Join Date: Aug 2008	Re: most humorous GURPS moments you've had? Fairly standard fantasy campaign, simple little act of getting a healing potion down someone's throat while they were unconscious. I botch the roll and he wakes up convinced I am trying to kill him, yells "Assassin!" while reaching for my throat, then collapses unconscious again. Became a bit of a running gag that campaign, and is still remembered fondly years later by myself and the other person. "Assassin!" thud

12-10-2009, 12:58 PM	#19
Threlgar Join Date: Sep 2009	Re: most humorous GURPS moments you've had? lol I have got one from that very same direction... The players captured an enemy spy. Player#1: We can´t let him live. Given time, he will escape and give away our plans. Player#2: I´m not going to let you kill him. Player#1: Why do you always have to take Pacifism to get some extra points ? You are no pacifist. Player#2: I am not. But my Character is. At least, he has Pacifism (Cannot kill). So, why don´t we just cut his hamstrings ? He is not going to go anywhere then...

12-11-2009, 01:52 AM	#20
Xipe_Totec Join Date: Sep 2004	Re: most humorous GURPS moments you've had? Oh, I just LOOOOOOOOOOOVE Pacifists. :D First GURPS game evah - we were testing the system with a one-shot military scenario - invading a terrorist camp and getting some hostages out. One player tried to do a McGuyver-type character, who disliked guns and was a pacifist (yeah, I know - IN THE ARMY... but that was our first go, so...). So, first thing he does is, when he spotted a sentry approaching, is leave a toolbox aside, and then throw a magnet at it - to cause noise and have him go check it out. So, the guard turns, PC rises, and tries to knock him out with a wrench. THUD - roll HT=5... nop, not unconcious. THUD - roll HT=7... nop, not unconscious. THUD - roll HT=8... nop, not uncoscious. THUD - HT fail, ok, "you've finally knocked down a person after hitting him 4 times over the head with a monkey wrench - very pacifistic of you". Game continues, they infiltrate, same PC comes upon a sentry taking a leak, and tries to rinse and repeat. Unfortunately, fails a stealth roll, and the sentry turns around, and places 2 bullets in his chest from a revolver. PC falls down, and sentry shoots the other 4 bullets (some hitting him, some not). Another PC approached the scene (after they basically cleaned everything else up) and is watching the sentry holding the first PC down, and loading rounds in the revolver. All the while I'm asking the other PC will he take the sentry down (sneaky-type, has silenced weapon with a laser-sight and took his sweet time aiming, ergo could take him down easily). The following goes on: SENTRY: Loads a round GM->PC2: "Want to take him down?" PC2: "Not yet." SENTRY: Loads a second round GM->PC2: "Want to take him down?" PC2: "Not yet." SENTRY: Loads a third round GM->PC2: "Want to take him down?" PC2: "Not yet." SENTRY: Spins the drum, closes the gun and primes the trigger GM->PC2: "Want to take him down?" PC2: "Not yet." SENTRY: CLICK GM->PC2: "Want to take him down?" PC2: "Not yet." SENTRY: CLICK GM->PC2: "Want to take him down?" PC2: "Not yet." SENTRY: BLAM!!!! GM->PC2: "Want to take him down now?" PC2: "Hm..... not yet." SENTRY: BLAM!!!!" GM->PC2: "How about now? PC1 is at -2xHT, he could die." PC2: "Hm...... ok, fine. I shoot the bad guy." BLAM!!!* SENTRY: dies Checking the recovery roll afterwards, PC1 spent a lot of time in the hospital and out of the game. The other 2 PCs said the next few sessions would be the best they had in a while. :) Must I mention the PC1 wasn't univesally liked? ;)