Damage From an Evil Vending Machine

[Pursuivant]

Originally Posted by sir-talen

harmless but stale muffins

How do you know that they're harmless?

Mold spores might have had a millennium to figure out how to survive and thrive on the muffins' surface. When hurled, the muffins might burst into a cloud of malevolent mutant muffin mold spores, dealing out whatever wicked effects the GM can imagine. Perhaps some combination of hallucinogens, toxic damage, and fungal disease.

Twinkies, being utterly immune to mold, bacteria, etc. even over geological time periods, might have hardened into the equivalent of creme-filled sling stones.