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-   -   Favorite Gnomco Products (http://forums.sjgames.com/showthread.php?t=158311)

David Johansen 06-19-2020 05:34 PM

Re: Favorite Gnomco Products
 
Gnome Co #2 Brique
Don't mistake this for one of those substandard bricks made by other companies! The Gnome Co #2 Brick is fire hardened by master brique makers and favored by masters of the ancient art of Briqujuitsu. These fine red blocks have six holes for maximum finger placement, not two, four, or eight like some other inferior brands we could mention. A Gnome Co #2 Brique is suitable for all your building projects but it's also a lethal weapon. Combined with two Gnome Co Soques it can be broken and made into two whiling cyclones of death! One for you and one for a friend or dual weild like a true master! Briques are also a great way to bridge communications gap with your enemies! All you need is a Gnome Co felt tipped pen, a Gnome Co note pad, and a window and you can guarantee your message will let them know how you really feel about them. Even if you're illiterate!

martinl 06-23-2020 11:00 AM

Re: Favorite Gnomco Products
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by David Johansen (Post 2329307)
Gnome Co #2 Brique

Bravo Sir! Balanced, Fine, and Ornate definitely apply here.

That said, smaller aficionados may prefer the #2a "Briquette".

martinl 08-19-2020 09:20 PM

Re: Favorite Gnomco Products
 
Gnomco Dragon's Teeth

Plant one of these enchanted teeth in the earth and watch a fully formed, equipped, and trained Gnomco Dragon Warrior™ grow in only 2d-1 seconds!
  • Gnomco Dragon Warrior™ not guaranteed to be friendly, non-hostile, or even unzerk
  • Gnomco Dragon Warrior™ may not technically have a soul - do not use for ritual sacrifice
  • Dragon's teeth not actually teeth
  • Dragon's teeth not actually related to dragons in any way
  • If Gnomco Dragon Warrior™ begins to vibrate, withdraw as expeditiously as possible and seek hard cover
  • Do not taunt Gnomco Dragon Warrior™

talonthehand 08-22-2020 11:51 AM

Re: Favorite Gnomco Products
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by martinl (Post 2329882)
Bravo Sir! Balanced, Fine, and Ornate definitely apply here.

That said, smaller aficionados may prefer the #2a "Briquette".

Or #2b Let 'Em Get Over Mini-Briques, for use as caltrops.

Ordo_Lyrae 12-28-2020 04:23 PM

Re: Favorite Gnomco Products
 
Gnomco Inflatable Raft

Presenting the Gnomco Inflatable Raft! Underground bodies of water are hazardous and swimming in armor is difficult, boats are too large to carry around in the dungeon, until now! Made from premium giant frog skin [1] they are guaranteed not to leak! [2] These inflatable rafts come in three sizes: 2-person, 3-person and 6-person. Travel quickly [3] and safely [4] across any intervening body of water! [5]

[1] Gnomco makes no guarantees as to the quality of giant frog skin.
[2] Guarantee void upon initial inflation.
[3] Gnomco Inflatable Rafts do not include any method of propulsion.
[4] The odor, flavor and shape of Gnomco Inflatable Rafts has been known to attract aquatic monsters, Gnomco strongly recommends avoiding any body of water that may be inhabited.
[5] Gnomco Inflatable Rafts are not rated as seaworthy vessels and should not be used in any body of water with waves taller than a Gnome's foot.

Edited with rules!

2 person raft weighs 10, 3 person 15, and 6 person 30 lbs. Inflating a raft takes 1d minutes per capacity. Every minute a character spends inflating a raft requires a HT roll, failure means the loss of 1 FP. Once a raft is fully inflated and placed in the water roll 3d, on a 6 or less it has sprung a leak. If the raft is leaking it will lose buoyancy in 3d seconds. In any inhabited body of water the raft attracts predators on a roll of 9 or less on 3d. Rafts have DR 1 and HP 5. Any damage exceeding DR causes a leak as above, if a raft reaches 0 HP it immediately sinks. Makeshift oars (spades, staffs, etc.) propel the raft at a rate of 2yds per turn, using hands to paddle moves the raft at 1yd per turn. True oars/paddles propels the raft at a rate of 3yds per turn. You can also us the Shape Air spell to propel the raft at 1yd per energy per turn.

Anders 12-28-2020 05:23 PM

Re: Favorite Gnomco Products
 
Flask of Spirit Trapping

If you pour spirits into this bottle, the only way you can get them out is by breaking the bottle.

martinl 12-30-2020 07:38 PM

Re: Favorite Gnomco Products
 
Gnomco Light Sabre™

Weighs only 80% as much as a regular sabre! [1]

[1] When parrying, treat Gnomco Light Sabre as weighing 50% as much as a regular sabre.

martinl 01-13-2021 10:24 AM

Re: Favorite Gnomco Products
 
Gnomco Vorpal Toenail Snippers™

This tiny scissor is of appropriate size for trimming the nails of most humanoids. Despite appearances it is not actually made of gleaming, translucent metal but rather of pure Gnomic Force™, and thus completely indestructible [1] by non-gnomic technology, incredibly sharp[2], and perhaps a bit slippery[3]. Up your delver's personal grooming game today!

[1] Do no immerse in healing potion.
[2] 1d-5 cutting damage, but armor divisor is 100, round down. This thing can cut doilies out of orichalcum heavy plate.
[3] All fails are critical fails. GMs are encouraged to make RAW crit fails nasty.

martinl 01-13-2021 05:48 PM

Re: Favorite Gnomco Products
 
Gnomco Bucket of Assorted Severed Fingertips™

Don't ask why we have this for sale, just look at that price!

johndallman 01-14-2021 03:57 AM

Re: Favorite Gnomco Products
 
Gnomco Extra-Tasty Sausage Patties™

New, experimental line! When they're gone, they're gone!


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