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Old 06-21-2012, 05:06 PM   #1
Ego Archive
 
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Default [DF] One shot- Crevan Brokenhands Last Rest

After seeing the great adventure Stripe put together (and being bored at work today), I thought I would see what I could whip up. This is intended as a "One Shot", but as I haven't run through it yet, I'm not sure if that's realistic. This encounter will use the N scaling method outlined in DF Adventure 1 - Mirror of the Fire Demon (Page 10). Additionally it will use monsters and items from Dungeon Fantasy Monsters 1, and several other Dungeon Fantasy books. Please feel free to make suggestions, and point out any errors, grammatical or otherwise. Any improvements benefit everyone.
I created the map using Maptools, and Probono's fantastic map pack. However exporting Maps (from Maptools) isn't ideal, so the resolution is less then I would like.

The back story (how the adventurers get here), is nonexistent at the moment. I'm thinking that when I run it, I will have a Draugr destroyed while attacking a caravan. The Draugr will have been uttering "Crevan Wakes!", over and over. The story (from a caravan guard), should lead the group to the location of the fight, then they can track the Draugr's path back to the crypt. Obviously I will have them make a history roll, or discover somehow else the back story of Crevan.
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Last edited by Ego Archive; 06-21-2012 at 05:47 PM.
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Old 06-21-2012, 05:08 PM   #2
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Default Re: [DF] One shot- Crevan Brokenhands Last Rest

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Crevan Brokenhand

Crevan, regarded as the greatest of the Barbarian Kings, is renowned for hundreds of miles as the last barbarian to unite the various tribes under one banner. The horde Crevan commanded laid waste to the countryside far and wide. He earned the name "Brokenhand" at one of the first sieges he commanded. While leading the first charge Crevan’s hand was crushed by a blow with a maul. Rather then nurse his badly broken hand; he opted to have the hand bound to the grip of his broadsword. Crevan continued with the siege for 12 days, until the fort was taken, with his sword perpetually "at hand".

Crevan Brokenhands Last Rest

This burial tomb of the last king of the barbarians, is a small affair, but said to be laden with some of Crevans' most valued treasures. The location of the tomb was forgotten long ago, with much of the rest of Crevans’ story.

Outside- The adventurers stumble upon a small hill ringed with stones of roughly 6 feet in height. The forest in this area is very dense, and if not for the path of broken underbrush leading to it, the burial mound would have easily been missed. The hill is mostly obscured by heavy brush that has grown all around the area. The ring is comprised of 12 stones spaced equal distance apart from one another, around the 15 meter wide hill. On the South side of the hill is a stone entrance, with stairs leading into the ground. It appears that the entrance was covered with a heavy slab of rock until recently, however the slab has been toppled over, and crushed all the brush that had grown over the entrance.

The entrance is roughly 2 meters wide by 3 meters tall, and descends into the earth roughly 10 meters.

1. The stairs leading down into the crypt are heavily laden in dirt and have begun to crumble with age, the stonework of the walls is of exceptional quality, with small reliefs of battles etched into the stones. The ceilings are great slabs of smooth stone. Where the corridor turns left the walls have caved in causing the corridor to be filled with loose rock and dirt over half way up. Getting through the corridor is difficult terrain, and may require climbing or dex checks to avoid twisting an ankle, or stumbling and falling through. Additionally the PC's can make a listen roll to hear scraping coming from the south (area 2), it sounds like boots crunching around the area.

2. This open space with vaulted ceiling smells of moldering plants and rotting meat, more so than you would expect with a tomb. In this area there are N Draugr (P. 12, DF Monsters 1). Also be aware of the Horrid Skull in area 4. The Draugr are shambling around aimlessly, until a target presents itself, by either attacking them, or trying to enter area 5, where their personal treasures are.

3. This alter to some ancient god, is completely intact, with no signs of decay, or dust on the surfaces. The large brazier in the center of the room is inscribed with writings of some forgotten language, as are the bases of the fountains on the three walls of this room. Water is still tricking out of the fountains, and the bases are filled with clear and untainted water.


4. This room is filled with trinkets and fetishes of various types, including some made with animal bones and other less recognizable materials. A decayed and largely disintegrated skeleton is slumped over one of the large tables. The skeleton is of fairly small stature (an anatomy roll will determine that it is a female), and the perfectly preserved skull has settled to stare disconcertingly at the doorway. The skull is a Horrid Skull (DF Monsters 1, P.19) and will continue to assault everyone in the area until destroyed. Additionally the various tables in the room are covered in the remains of scrolls that have decayed into useless scraps, and clay containers that have fallen apart, emptying moldering contents all over the tables.

Along the far wall is a table with a couple items that can be recognized as magical with a Perception+Magery roll or Mage Sight spell. A wood Helm and Mask (Maaukepu’s Mask; DF 6 - 40 Artifacts, P.8), and a rune-inscribed metal flask with the stopper sealed by wax (Spirit Flask; DF 6 - 40 Artifacts, P.22); inside the Spirit Flask is nature spirit who (if successfully negotiated with) may offer to heal the party or answer a question. Alternatively the Spirit may just leave if the group antagonizes it, or if things go really poorly it may hinder them in some way.

5. This area of the main chamber has several chests scattered along the south wall, and two large braziers on either side of an archway leading to the east. There are also N open (and empty) sarcophagi lined up in a row near the South wall of the room. The chests (3 total) are locked with simple locks. Inside the chests are d3+2 Swords of fine quality and varying types; d6X$100 in various coins of precious metal. Additionally, roll N times on the Treasure Type Table (DF 8 - Treasure Tables, P.7)

6. Stairs descend several feet down into this area. This area is dominated by a huge statue of barbarian, with a large shield and a massive Broadsword. The statue depicts the mans hand bound with ropes and fabric to the pommel of the sword. Obviously this is a representation of Crevan at the seige he is so renowned for.

This area is brightly lit by four burning braziers. Inspection of the braziers would determine that they are enchanted, but each is several hundred pounds at roughly 5 feet of solid stone. On the opposite side of this room another set of stairs ascend several feet to an archway opening to a corridor continuing east.


7. These four alcoves each contain one Golem-Armor Swordsman (DF 2, P.24) with an additional N-4 Golem-Armor Swordsman positioned in area 8. Anyone Moving into area 7 will awaken these protectors from their slumber. The Golems in area 8 will also start moving into the area.


8. This Crypt contains two Sarcophagi, and an alter at the far end of the room. Strewn around the room are treasures of all sorts, Including Nd6X$100 worth of coins of various types. A pair of gleaming bracers (Bracers of Force- DR1; DF 6 - 40 Artifacts, P.5), A heavy Gold chain ($2,000), a bowl filled with Emeralds(7), Rubies(6), Sapphires(4) $35 each. And Nx2 rolls on the Treasure Type Table (DF 8 - Treasure Tables, P.7)

Conspicuously, the lids of the Sarcophagi have been pushed off and have fallen to the floor where they have broken into several pieces. Also, both of the sarcophagus are empty.
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Old 06-21-2012, 11:52 PM   #3
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Default Re: [DF] One shot- Crevan Brokenhands Last Rest

Just wanted to say that this is great and once it's done I'll totally use it. Thanks much! Keep it up!
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Old 06-22-2012, 12:53 AM   #4
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Default Re: [DF] One shot- Crevan Brokenhands Last Rest

My ears were burning. ;)

I'm very glad Shadowyrm helped inspire you to create and post this wonderful dungeon!

If you'd like me to convert the map to hexes with some standard filters/textures, I be happy to do so. Let me know (PS: Also, let me know what, if any, of my suggestions you would like me to incorporate). You'd have to add the furniture and statues and stuff, though. Or, if you know some links with some good top-down dungeon art on transparent backgrounds, I'd be willing to use them.

"Crevan, regarded as the greatest of the Barbarian Kings, is renown for hundreds of miles..." -- that'll make it a complete sentence. I'd replace some "he's" with "Crevan's" to make that first paragraph read just a bit better, too.

Speaking of Crevan, his name in title needs an apostrophe: "Crevan Brokenhand's Last Rest." Would "Final" sound better than "Last?" Dunno.

Right after the sentence that starts, "This burial tomb of the last king..." I'd add some fluff that the tomb's location has been lost/forgotten for a long time so one knows where it's at. That's why it's not been looted already when the PC's find it. Just a sentence or two should suffice. Or, even just call it "The lost burial tomb of the last king..." A heavy slab of rock probably wouldn't stop tomb raiders.

Your descriptions of the rooms are very well written. My complements.

I thought the Druagur were a bit passive until I read in their description that they don't speak and may ignore delvers. Cool.

Reading through this for the first time, I'm wondering why area 3 is important. It may be explained later, but it would be good to mention it now. I notice that there's an extra blank line there, so perhaps it's still a work in progress. (PS: Not explained. Needs some reason for being here. I'd put my suggested "Weapon X" here, explained below.)

Good use of the horrid skull.

As for the sentence, "...items that can be recognized as magical with the appropriate rolls," I'd go ahead and state, "with a Perception+Magery roll or Mage Sight spell," instead. I don't think there's another method other than those two and if there is, it's probably very specialized. I could be wrong.

In that same paragraph, you can hyphenate "rune-inscribed" if you're seeking to impress English teachers.

Might I suggest, for area 5, instead of having chests put some of Crevan's fallen comrades here in either shelf-like catacombs or sarcophagi? The treasure sounds like stuff that could be found among the remains of warriors.

Very minor spelling, grammar and punctuation edits for you:

6. Stairs descend several feet down into this area. This area is dominated by a huge statue of barbarian with a large shield and massive broadsword. The statue depicts the man's right hand bound with ropes and fabric to the pommel of the sword. Obviously, this as a representation of Crevan at the siege he is so renown for. Additionally, this area is brightly lit by four burning braziers. Inspection of the braziers would determine that they are enchanted, but as each is several hundred pounds, they probably are not worth taking. On the opposite side of this room, another set of stairs ascend several feet to a hall continuing east.

Area 6 is the only* problem with the map I have. It seems as if there's almost no way to get around the statue. I can understand them wanting it to dominate the room, but I think there should be amble space to walk around it. You almost run face-first into it as soon as you get down the stairs. I'd suggest making the room about twice as big at least.

There's also nothing going on in area 6. It's empty and uneventful. PC's might spend extra time here just to figure out what they're supposed to do. Hidden staircase beneath the statue? Runes of importance to a later puzzle in the dungeon? Hidden treasure? Potentially, a fair amount of real-time could be wasted here for a big let down.

Of course there can be empty rooms, but I'd suggest this not be one.

Area 7: FOUR golem-armor swordsmen!? With more as reinforcements even?! Wowza! I've not yet ran a DF game being new to the expansion, but I was under the impression that these are heavy hitters approaching boss-level power. No?

Personally, I'd go with N-2 total stone golems. A bit cliché, but they seem more in-genre for motionless, tireless tomb guardians. I always thought of GAS's as more befitting demonic torture chambers, halls of horror, the Lair of Dr. Frankenstein, etc.

Sarcophagi, I believe, is the plural of sarcophagus.

Area 8: I'm a bit let down here. It seems like you wanted a really big battle in area 7, then a big treasure room.

Personally, that's not how I would play it. I'd go a bit easier on the combat in area 7, then have a solo boss fight in area 8.

This is a perfect place for a "Skeleton King" encounter. A Draug Lord on steroids. Make the players rue the day they dared stand against the dread Crevan himself.

http://the-lost-and-the-damned.66461...6/DSC01023.jpg

http://galeon.hispavista.com/criatur...img/conan2.jpg

If I may, I'd suggest making area 8 four times as big. Make it a huge hall with columns and vaulted ceilings like area 4, but perhaps even more opulent.

Here's another suggestion I think you'll like: put in your lore section that Crevan was killed by a special weapon; something highly recognizable, like the boar spear of a storm giant tossed from a thunderhead like a bolt of lightning (Oversized SM+1, Lightning Weapon, Orichalcum, Ornate, Fine, Balanced). Then, put that weapon in the tomb.

With that done, you can give an undead Crevan boss an Achilles' Heel to that weapon. You can give him Unkillable 3 (Achilles' Heel: Weapon X), Regeneration (Extreme, Not Against Weapon X), Vulnerability (Weapon X), DR 20 (Not Against Weapon X), etc.

As has been said many times, bosses as solo encounters need plenty of Damage Resistance and Hit Points. Extra Attacks (p. B53) and Injury Tolerance (Damage Reduction) from Powers, pp. 52-53, can both be highly beneficial.

I'd suggest having his broadsword chained to his arm. Then, allow the chains to magically reel the sword back into his hand as a Ready maneuver.

Like I say, a very nicely done one-shot adventure! Hope you find some good use for my suggestions. Again, let me know about a map. :)


*PS: Actually, I thought of an additional issue I have with the map -- no branches. I always like to have at least a couple ways to get to the end. In Shadowyrm, the players are presented with two paths right off area 1, one being a quick dead end. Then, there are two paths to the final area: jump the abyss or climb the cliff, or walk all the way around. This issue doesn't detract from your adventure, but I think addressing it would be beneficial.
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Old 06-22-2012, 09:30 AM   #5
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Default Re: [DF] One shot- Crevan Brokenhands Last Rest

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stripe View Post
My ears were burning. ;)

If you'd like me to convert the map to hexes with some standard filters/textures, I be happy to do so. Let me know (PS: Also, let me know what, if any, of my suggestions you would like me to incorporate). You'd have to add the furniture and statues and stuff, though. Or, if you know some links with some good top-down dungeon art on transparent backgrounds, I'd be willing to use them.
I think I can incorporate hexes, and do some of the modifications you mention below, with the Maptools export. Let me give that a try. If it's still problematic, I will definitively take you up on that offer.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stripe View Post
Speaking of Crevan, his name in title needs an apostrophe: "Crevan Brokenhand's Last Rest." Would "Final" sound better than "Last?" Dunno.

Right after the sentence that starts, "This burial tomb of the last king..." I'd add some fluff that the tomb's location has been lost/forgotten for a long time so one knows where it's at. That's why it's not been looted already when the PC's find it. Just a sentence or two should suffice. Or, even just call it "The lost burial tomb of the last king..." A heavy slab of rock probably wouldn't stop tomb raiders.
Your right it would, however it appears I cannot change the threads title. I meant to have something about the tomb being lost and obscured, thank you for reminding me, and hopefully the addition will make that a bit more obvious.

My thought was that the tomb would still be hidden if not for the path the draugr created, as for why other adventurers haven't plundered it so far.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stripe View Post
Your descriptions of the rooms are very well written. My complements.

I thought the Druagur were a bit passive until I read in their description that they don't speak and may ignore delvers. Cool.

Reading through this for the first time, I'm wondering why area 3 is important. It may be explained later, but it would be good to mention it now. I notice that there's an extra blank line there, so perhaps it's still a work in progress. (PS: Not explained. Needs some reason for being here. I'd put my suggested "Weapon X" here, explained below.)
Originally I had a plan for an encounter in this room, but as I was writing up the rooms, I began to come up with an extended story in my head. This room has to do with that, and is currently reserved for later one-shots. :D

That said, it may be frustrating for the party to encounter empty rooms, much like you alluded to for rooms 6 & 8, so I'm open to suggestions. However room 8 serves a very specific function to a continued story arc, so keep that in mind.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stripe View Post
Good use of the horrid skull.
Thanks, I need to highlight that a little better I think. I have a concern that as it is, a GM could miss that it would effect players while fighting in area 2.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stripe View Post
As for the sentence, "...items that can be recognized as magical with the appropriate rolls," I'd go ahead and state, "with a Perception+Magery roll or Mage Sight spell," instead. I don't think there's another method other than those two and if there is, it's probably very specialized. I could be wrong.

In that same paragraph, you can hyphenate "rune-inscribed" if you're seeking to impress English teachers.

Might I suggest, for area 5, instead of having chests put some of Crevan's fallen comrades here in either shelf-like catacombs or sarcophagi? The treasure sounds like stuff that could be found among the remains of warriors.

Very minor spelling, grammar and punctuation edits for you:

6. Stairs descend several feet down into this area. This area is dominated by a huge statue of barbarian with a large shield and massive broadsword. The statue depicts the man's right hand bound with ropes and fabric to the pommel of the sword. Obviously, this as a representation of Crevan at the siege he is so renown for. Additionally, this area is brightly lit by four burning braziers. Inspection of the braziers would determine that they are enchanted, but as each is several hundred pounds, they probably are not worth taking. On the opposite side of this room, another set of stairs ascend several feet to a hall continuing east.
Added and incorporated, Thanks!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stripe View Post
Area 6 is the only* problem with the map I have. It seems as if there's almost no way to get around the statue. I can understand them wanting it to dominate the room, but I think there should be amble space to walk around it. You almost run face-first into it as soon as you get down the stairs. I'd suggest making the room about twice as big at least.

There's also nothing going on in area 6. It's empty and uneventful. PC's might spend extra time here just to figure out what they're supposed to do. Hidden staircase beneath the statue? Runes of importance to a later puzzle in the dungeon? Hidden treasure? Potentially, a fair amount of real-time could be wasted here for a big let down.

Of course there can be empty rooms, but I'd suggest this not be one.
The size of the statue/room, was more of a mapping oversight. I will change that with the next export.
I'm open to suggestions,on what to do with area 6. I just felt having the statue of Crevan, conveyed a very tomb feel to the place. When I started putting this together, I envisioned it as a (4-6 hour) "encounter" style thing that I could run at a gaming event. With that in mind I didn't want to try to cram too many combats into the tomb. Maybe having a secret cache here would be a good compromise?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stripe View Post
Area 7: FOUR golem-armor swordsmen!? With more as reinforcements even?! Wowza! I've not yet ran a DF game being new to the expansion, but I was under the impression that these are heavy hitters approaching boss-level power. No?

Personally, I'd go with N-2 total stone golems. A bit cliché, but they seem more in-genre for motionless, tireless tomb guardians. I always thought of GAS's as more befitting demonic torture chambers, halls of horror, the Lair of Dr. Frankenstein, etc.
I originally thought of doing that, but then I remembered that the (spoilers), last hall of DF Adventures 1 features the same thing. So I thought to myself, myself what other types of guardians would a Barbarian King have standing over his crypt? It occurred to me that his personal guard, bound to watch him from intruders, for eternity would be a perfect fit. You may be right on the power level, but keep in mind that I was intending for them to be the "Boss Fight".

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stripe View Post
Sarcophagi, I believe, is the plural of sarcophagus.

Area 8: I'm a bit let down here. It seems like you wanted a really big battle in area 7, then a big treasure room.

Personally, that's not how I would play it. I'd go a bit easier on the combat in area 7, then have a solo boss fight in area 8.

This is a perfect place for a "Skeleton King" encounter. A Draug Lord on steroids. Make the players rue the day they dared stand against the dread Crevan himself.

http://the-lost-and-the-damned.66461...6/DSC01023.jpg

http://galeon.hispavista.com/criatur...img/conan2.jpg

If I may, I'd suggest making area 8 four times as big. Make it a huge hall with columns and vaulted ceilings like area 4, but perhaps even more opulent.

Here's another suggestion I think you'll like: put in your lore section that Crevan was killed by a special weapon; something highly recognizable, like the boar spear of a storm giant tossed from a thunderhead like a bolt of lightning (Oversized SM+1, Lightning Weapon, Orichalcum, Ornate, Fine, Balanced). Then, put that weapon in the tomb.

>>Snipped for character saving<<

I'd suggest having his broadsword chained to his arm. Then, allow the chains to magically reel the sword back into his hand as a Ready maneuver.

When I started Crevan was intended as the Boss fight, but as I was writing this up, a story started to form in my head. This story revolves around area 3, and the fact that both Sarcophagi are currently empty. Of course then this stops being a one shot, and becomes a intro...so maybe I should write up two different versions? In one you have something interesting in area 3, and Crevan at the end- in the other you have the mystery to solve.

Alternatively, I could have N-2 Blade-Swordsman in the alcoves, and when they wake, the Statue (Golem) could attack from the rear. Then Crevan (Draugr Lord) with enchanted sword in area 8. Of course with the spear in Area 3, in this case.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stripe View Post
*PS: Actually, I thought of an additional issue I have with the map -- no branches. I always like to have at least a couple ways to get to the end. In Shadowyrm, the players are presented with two paths right off area 1, one being a quick dead end. Then, there are two paths to the final area: jump the abyss or climb the cliff, or walk all the way around. This issue doesn't detract from your adventure, but I think addressing it would be beneficial.
As it should be completed in 4-6 hours, I didn't want to make it too confusing/add too many combat encounters. Do you think having a hallway and room off of the witches lab would be a good addition?

Thanks for all of the suggestions, I think they will help the adventure immensely!
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Old 06-22-2012, 10:19 AM   #6
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Default Re: [DF] One shot- Crevan Brokenhands Last Rest

Regarding forking paths:

Choices for the players to make are good, but they have to be meaningful choices. Having dead-end paths doesn't make for real choices, unless there's a consequence for taking the dead-end (good OR bad). If the players know there's a chance to be surprised and cornered by a wandering monster, or wasting precious time before the virgin sacrifice, etc these are all meaningful, as is a chance to find more treasure, especially a weapon useful against "the end boss".

Similarly, having two paths to the same end area isn't really a choice unless there's a notable difference between them. If path A) leads through two dungeon rooms with two "equal level" encounters and path B) leads through two dungeon rooms with two "equal level" encounters, that's not really significant. But, if path B) has NO monsters at all and offers a crazy good shortcut, and the players have any way of determining that, it's not really a "choice" either - you'd be stupid not to take the fast safe route.

It's like if you have a "choice" between two advantages that cost 5 points - one gives +1 to your favorite attacks, and the other gives +2 to your favorite attacks. That's not a choice at all, that's just a booby-trap for someone who doesn't notice the second advantage. Eidedic Memory in 3e was like that - it was either insanely good (and you were stupid not to take it) or insanely bad (and you were stupid to take it).

If you can't come up with a significant choice, and it's a small area, straight-through is perfectly fine. Having a scattering of small 3-5 room "straight-through" dungeons works surprisingly well, because the player choice is in which dungeon to poke their noses into (and when) rather than having different routes through a single dungeon.

The classic Keep on the Borderlands was based around this model, although the "areas" are larger because the original game played through pretty darn quickly (either you die immediately, or the monsters die immediately :)
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Old 06-22-2012, 10:20 AM   #7
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Default Re: [DF] One shot- Crevan Brokenhands Last Rest

Sorry, I just realized I dragged your thread a little off topic. This is an area where two of my interests start really overlapping so I get excited ;)
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Old 06-22-2012, 10:32 AM   #8
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Quote:
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If you can't come up with a significant choice, and it's a small area, straight-through is perfectly fine. Having a scattering of small 3-5 room "straight-through" dungeons works surprisingly well, because the player choice is in which dungeon to poke their noses into (and when) rather than having different routes through a single dungeon.
This may be straying off topic, but this reminds me of the difference in dungeon design between Daggerfall and the later Elder Scrolls games, particularly Skyrim. Daggerfall had these massive, randomly-generated labyrinths that were kinda fun at first, but eventually just a pain to navigate. In Skyrim, the majority of dungeons are a straight line through to the end room, often with a shortcut from there directly back to the exit. Sometimes I like wandering through a sprawling complex, but for tabletop gaming the simpler design is probably best.
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Old 06-22-2012, 11:15 AM   #9
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Default Re: [DF] One shot- Crevan Brokenhands Last Rest

Since we're doing small spelling/grammar edits :)

I thought I'd just throw in this one: it might be nice to change "renown" to "renowned" when you use it as an adjective. This happens twice:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ego Archive View Post

Crevan, regarded as the greatest of the Barbarian Kings, is renownED for hundreds of miles as the last barbarian to...

...
6. The statue depicts the mans hand bound with ropes and fabric to the pommel of the sword. Obviously this is a representation of Crevan at the seige he is so renownED for.
You might want to watch out for Stripes' changes, too - I'm not sure they've been as incorporated as you think - see "mans" vs "man's" and "seige" vs "siege", above.

In passing: I really like the way this dungeon takes us back into some history. If the GM runs it with real atmosphere, the players could really get the sense that, as they travel deeper into the dungeon, they're also traveling back deeper into some glorious heroic past, which is only now returning to life...

That's great, in my view - for me, this relationship between going deeper into the dungeon and going deeper into history really hits at the heart of good, as opposed to overly schlock, dungeon fantasy. So thanks for that!
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Old 06-22-2012, 03:45 PM   #10
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Let me first say that I wholeheartedly agree with everything Bruno stated and my suggestion that examining the possibility of adding a branch (or not) was made under those pretenses. Like I said, it won't detract from your dungeon if you decide not to add a branch. There's something to be said for a good straight-through design.

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My thought was that the tomb would still be hidden if not for the path the draugr created, as for why other adventurers haven't plundered it so far.
That's a good idea. Hopefully, players will take the bait and decide to follow its trail.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ego Archive View Post
That said, it may be frustrating for the party to encounter empty rooms, much like you alluded to for rooms 6 & 8, so I'm open to suggestions.
Just area 3 and 6, not 8. Area 8 is a treasure vault. No player minds finding those! :)

Again, not that I'm against empty rooms as long as there's a reason they're empty (e.g., an empty crypt where the draugr once lay). Even then, I'll often put something in them -- a page torn from a spell book or diary; a ripped belt pouch with 2d gold coins scattered throughout the room; a false tile with a stash beneath it; a lost earring; etc., etc.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ego Archive View Post
I have a concern that as it is, a GM could miss that it would effect players while fighting in area 2.
I forgot to suggest to include that info in area 2. You're right; area 2 needs that information. Else, every GM who runs this is going to be counting hexes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ego Archive View Post
I'm open to suggestions,on what to do with area 6.
Well, I made a few.

If the room is large, the PC's are probably going to fall back here to battle the armor golems. If that's the case, then this room could potentially be left empty.

Still, it just feels wrong to me. I'd try to think of something to do with it. It just draws the players' attentions so much. If I were a PC here, I'd scour every inch of that statue with a magnifying glass in the absence of a time-limiting factor. Then, I'd be a bit let down when I found that's it's just a room with a big statue.

Just saying.

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Originally Posted by Ego Archive View Post
I just felt having the statue of Crevan, conveyed a very tomb feel to the place.
It does. You're right.

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Originally Posted by Ego Archive View Post
Maybe having a secret cache here would be a good compromise?
Perhaps.

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Originally Posted by Ego Archive View Post
You may be right on the power level, but keep in mind that I was intending for them to be the "Boss Fight".
Oh, I got that. I'm just wondering -- and more experienced DF GM's should chime in here -- if that's not going to be a slaughter for four-five 250/-40/-5-point characters.

If you up the power level to where they can take on four armor golems at once, won't the draugr be fodder? Not sure. Just curious. Have yet to run DF.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ego Archive View Post
Of course then this stops being a one shot, and becomes a intro...so maybe I should write up two different versions? In one you have something interesting in area 3, and Crevan at the end- in the other you have the mystery to solve.
Oh, that's a smashing idea. Love that.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ego Archive View Post
Alternatively, I could have N-2 Blade-Swordsman in the alcoves, and when they wake, the Statue (Golem) could attack from the rear. Then Crevan (Draugr Lord) with enchanted sword in area 8. Of course with the spear in Area 3, in this case.
Have the statue be a golem? Hadn't considered that. Might work, if you like the idea.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ego Archive View Post
As it should be completed in 4-6 hours, I didn't want to make it too confusing/add too many combat encounters. Do you think having a hallway and room off of the witches lab would be a good addition?
A secret hallway, maybe. But, yes, a single branch would be nice, even if this is meant to be a quick one-shot.

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Originally Posted by Ego Archive View Post
Thanks for all of the suggestions, I think they will help the adventure immensely!
You're very welcome! :)

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Originally Posted by Joe View Post
You might want to watch out for Stripes' changes, too - I'm not sure they've been as incorporated as you think - see "mans" vs "man's" and "seige" vs "siege", above.
Yeah, I'd highly suggest just copy/pasting that paragraph. That's why I put it there. There are just several little things -- too many to point out.

That's not to say you didn't do a fine job writing this. It's very well written.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Joe View Post
In passing: I really like the way this dungeon takes us back into some history. If the GM runs it with real atmosphere, the players could really get the sense that, as they travel deeper into the dungeon, they're also traveling back deeper into some glorious heroic past, which is only now returning to life...
Agreed. Great atmosphere here.
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