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Old 03-06-2011, 10:43 PM   #541
Mark Skarr
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

My IST New York game has, unfortunately, died. Two of the PCs moved and one of them is no longer gaming with us.

Today, I launched my new IST LA game, including three new gamers, one had played some GURPS, one had only played one other session of GURPS, and one who was only aware of GURPS because they're a huge Munchkin fan. None of them had ever played Supers before.

--
Me: The shot goes right over your head but Patriot catches it on his shield and is knocked back about thirty feet. Vitaly, are you bald?
Vitaly: Uh . . ..
Me: You are now.

Vitaly: Freaking forcefield! He's really made me mad. I'm going to punch the robot.
Vitaly (Rolls a 3)
Me (Make some rolls): All right, don't roll on the crit table, I know what effect I want. Roll damage.
Vitaly (Spectacular damage roll)
Me (Make some more rolls): Your punch bypasses the force field and you manage to punch through the robot's armored leg (robot is 15 yd tall). It falls backward. Shade, you're behind the robot. Make a dodge.
Shade: I think I'll try for an acrobatic dodge.
Vitaly: Be sure to make your acrobatics check.
Shade: Of course I will.
Shade (Rolls an 18)
Shade: Of course I won't!

All in all, great game with new players. They really enjoyed their characters. Even Harmonix who was taken out the first round of combat by a stray missile shot.
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Old 03-06-2011, 10:56 PM   #542
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

"Can we just go one session without somebody setting something on fire or blowing something up?"
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Old 03-07-2011, 02:30 AM   #543
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by McNutcase View Post
"Can we just go one session without somebody setting something on fire or blowing something up?"
We had a similar statement:
"Can't we have one mission without setting someone on fire or blowing someone up? These dry cleaning bills are killing me, they're not deductible."
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Old 03-07-2011, 06:33 AM   #544
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Same relationship as above quotes, during a downtime session the Bard starts acting really secretive, fiddling with bits of paper, writing something up, disappearing from the pub, whenever anyone asks where he's going he blatently lies, ect.
Eventually, the other PCs start getting suspicious and end up exploring what he's doing.
After...quite some effort, his girlfriend joins in, since she's noticed he's up to something too and, while she trusts him as much as she trusts anyone, ex-villianess habits of paranoia die hard.

When we finally track him down, having seen him visit an armourer, a tailor, a sweet shop, the Alchemist guild...several shady establishments known to house wizards of moral ambiguity, so forth, each place more slightly dodgy than the last...eventually, he goes to a warehouse on the waterfront, with a handcartful of...who knows what...

Eventually...we decide to burst in and confront him...the following dialouge proves what an incredible pokerface the Bard has.

GM; alright, you burst in...*To the bard* Describe the scene...what are you doing anyway?
Bard; You burst into the warehouse, to see the Bard, standing with a circle of Wizards in cowled robes, chanting ominously...dressed...like this.
He puts a picture in the middle of the table...I cannot even being to describe this thing, our Bard is a pretty talented artist...and he'd spent time on this one...think a cross between Sauron, Snidley Whiplash, Thulsa Doom, the worlds worst 'Bad guy soldier' uniform and...well, all designed by queer eye for the straight guy, it was just...well, you get the idea.
The Bard, with utter seriousness, puts on a handlebar mustache in real life, one of those solvent back ones.
Everyone stops.
And looks at the Bard, OOC and IC...who fumbles for a piece of paper and reads it out in a deadpan 'reading the lines' way
"Fools, you are too late, my evil plan has almost come to fruition, not even you can stop me now...mwhahahaha..."
Folds up paper neatly and puts it back in his pocket...Everyone stares on, then looks back at the picture and back at him.
GM: ...*Ex-BBEG* looks at you...and says...'Awha?' (First time she's ever been speechless, in the game)
Bard; NOW MY CIRCLE! CAST THE SPELL! MWHAHAHAHA!!!! *...total switch from 'neat and organized' to chewing the scenery evil, complete with 'tache twirling'*
The groups natural 'hero instinct' kicks in, and we have an epic fight...utterly bewildered and not having a clue what the hell is going on...but the Warehouse is a perfect arena, apparently someone has been modifying it in their spare time and its now a BBEG playground...he constantly chews the scenery through this whole thing...and the girlfriend helps the heroes, utterly bewildered by all this. Huge monolouges about villiany, heroics, friendship and what the hell is going on ensue.
Eventually...gets back to the circle, now almost finishes...whatever they're up to...and the Bard stands victorious over the captured heroes.
'Now, you shall all paaaaaaay!!! Ahahaha!!!"
Girlfriend: *Bursts out of no where* "...why?! I thought you were good! And Kind! And honest! Why!?"
Bard; 'You've tried my side of things...now I am trying yours...Happy anniversarry dear!'
*Cage drops into a relativly warm vat of melted chocolate*
No one says a word...
Almost 2 hours later, after the giggling fits, break, the GM working out what the hell just happened and so forth...
Fighter; "...this is the most retarded thing I've ever heard of."
Rouge; "It's kinda cute though..."
Barbarian; "...I need a drink." *Ladels melted chocolate into his mouth using a barrel*
Girlfriend; "You did...what was...we...I never acted like that!"
Barbarian; "Says you."
Bard; "Yeah, but I wanted to go for it whole or not at all...I was going to go pick on some orphans or something...but every time I tried I felt bad and ended up playing with them *Sheepish grin*"
Ex-BBEG; "...*Facepalms*"
Bard; "Well, looks like the ritual is done, thanks guys, here *Pays up a huge amount of gold to the Wizards, who wander off* see you! Safe journey home!"
Fighter: "...what did they do anyway?"
'Well I wanted to do something really ambitious while I was being a villian...look out the window'

He used powerful black magic, a power so violatile and ancient that even the gods themselves fear it at times to carve 'Who loves you babe? Happy anniversary' on the Moon.
The session broke down there for the evening really and didn't continue, how do you continue after that?

He later showed us how he did it, proving himself worryingly competent at being a villian...he wanted us to follow him, otherwise we'd have never known. Go figure.
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Old 03-07-2011, 06:44 AM   #545
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Drunk on the Titanic: I didn't order ice with my drink!!
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Old 03-07-2011, 11:04 PM   #546
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Almost forgot my favourite from the last game I GMed: [insert vaguely threatening speech by NPC, with allusions to what a certain PC did last time he was here]... "So, who was that, what does he think you did, and why's he full of s###?"
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Old 03-08-2011, 07:17 AM   #547
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

From a one-shot many years ago. My character was investigating a crashed spaceship, and had essentially picked a fight with the Jedi who had been aboard.

Jedi: *handwave* "You will stop shooting at me."
Me: (after making my saving throw) "No, I won't!"

after the Jedi was dead:

Me: "I'm a mercenary; mind tricks don't work on me! Only money!"

Cheesy, yes, but I got a nifty double-bladed lightsaber for my merc out of the deal. ;)
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Old 03-08-2011, 08:00 AM   #548
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by BLloyd607502 View Post
The session broke down there for the evening really and didn't continue, how do you continue after that?
Awesome story.
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Old 03-08-2011, 12:26 PM   #549
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

From Saturdays game, which was particularly funny.

PC5: "The opposite of 'culture' is not 'science!'"
GM: "I think the opposite of culture is the internet."

PC4: "Half the group are Pisces."
PC5: "That explains so much! No, wait, no it doesn't."

PC1: "An infinite number of monkeys on an infinite number of typewriters will eventually summon Yog-Sothoth."

On Charlie Sheen's family:
PC2: "I thought Emilio Estevez was pretty normal."

GM: "It's kind of invisible."
PC4: "What do you mean, 'kind of?'"
GM: "It's COMPLETELY invisible."
PC5: "How is that KIND OF?"
GM: "I wanted to break it to you gently?"

PC4: "Why are we discussing the reproductive health of the magical half-geriatric NPC?"
[everyone points at PC2]

On potato chips with "lemon chicken" and "baby back rib" and "ballpark hotdog" flavours:
GM: "Where do you GET those?"
PC1: "Loblaws."
GM: "I've been to Loblaws! I've never seen the secret aisle where you get those!"
PC5: "It's the one with the chips."

On Jewish Bugbears:
PC2: "A menorah would make a pretty good polearm."
PC3: "Clerics do get flame strike."
GM: "This is probably how bugbear judaism actually works."

The kobold and the ex-dragon are arguing.
PC4: "Okay, you two, just whip it out and compare"
PC2: "Mine's 1200 years bigger!"
PC5: "Mine takes two hands to wield!"
PC4: "I'm so sorry, I take it all back."

PC4: "What if we just open the locket and let them fight?"
PC5: "Somehow I doubt that two of Yog-Sothoth is better."
GM: "What's the plural of 'Yog-Sothoth', anyway?"

PC5: "Then we need to figure out how to make one quarter of a crumbled, damaged planet regain the will to live."
PC1: "First step, remove the kobold bard"

PC3: "This is your brain. THIS is your brain on fire."

PC1: "First he was a paladin of the war god. Then he was a champion of the war god. Now's the the avatar of the war god."
PC2: "This is starting to worry the war god."

PC5: "Yes, every time anyone says 'beer' the beer monks begin the beer chant and a procession arrives with a giant mug of beer. Oh, ****, I've just triggered it, like, six times."

GM: "We don't keep weapons here, to discourage adventurers. You know what happens when you tell people that there's a hidden city at the top of the world full of fantastic treasure? They get on their dragons and fly up here and then you NEVER get rid of them."

[on lunch supplies]
GM: "Please stop talking about PC2's meat."
PC4: "You just want to jam it all in your mouth all at once."

[after the telekinetic threw the magic circle that's spawning demons out of the airship]
PC5: "I can see my house from oh no wait my house is in the abyyyyyssssssss!"

PC1: "I have a pocket dimension."
PC5: "Chicks dig pocket dimensions."
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Old 03-09-2011, 01:20 AM   #550
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bruno View Post
On potato chips with "lemon chicken" and "baby back rib" and "ballpark hotdog" flavours:
GM: "Where do you GET those?"
PC1: "Loblaws."
GM: "I've been to Loblaws! I've never seen the secret aisle where you get those!"
PC5: "It's the one with the chips."
Heh. I used to hit the local used book shop with a friend of mine, who was continually baffled by my ability to find strangeness. We'd both prowl the same shelves, but somehow all of the bizarre stuff came my way. It was like I was some kind of weirdness magnet...
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