[Basic] Skill of the week: Housekeeping

[evileeyore]

Originally Posted by Phil Masters

I'm sorry, but "Critically Failed Housekeeping roll; result is permanent blindness" sounds like somebody's description of Rolepmaster. And not a favourable one.

An E crit chart on a Housekeeping roll, definitely serious:

Housekeeping/Kitchen Critical Table
01-05: -3 hits.

06-10: -6 hits. Stunned by chemical smell for one round.

11-15: Drop heavy pot on foot, stunned and unable to act next round.

16-20: Slip and fall, -6 hits. -10 on next task roll.

21-35: Strike head on cabinet while standing. -6 hits. Lose initiative next round.

36-45: Smash fingers in oven door. -12 hits. Lose initiative next round.

51-55: Lift wrong. -15 hits. Lose initiative and unable to parry next round.

56-60: Pantry shelf empties onto you. -15 hits. Stunned and at -15 next 2 rounds.

61-65: Inhale flour dust. -10 hits. Stunned and at -10 next round.

66: Catastrophic cleaver accident severs spine. -15 hits. Die instantly.

67-70: Scalding coffee to groin. If male lose ability propagate species. If female severe pain.

71-75: Refrigerator falls on you while cleaning it breaking your hip. -15 hits. -75 to all further actions. Stunned 3 rounds.

76-80: Slip and press elbow onto stove burner. -9 hits. Arm is useless. Stunned and unable to parry 2 rounds.

81-85: Drink industrial solvent by mistake. -30 hits. Drop and die of organ damage in 3 seconds.

86-90: Slip while cleaning fork and impale it into chest. Cannot breathe and inactive for 12 rounds. Then expire. Tragic, but comedic.

91-95: Fall off ladder onto head while changing lightbulb. -25 hits. Down for 6 rounds then die. Sad.

96-99: Heavy cookware falls on head from top shelf. +30 hits. Die immediately. Add +20 to next roll. You have a half round left to act.

100: Food explodes in face, +35 hits. roll d100: 01-30: Both eyes destroyed, 31-60 one eye destroyed, 61-100 neither eye destroyed. Severe burns, stunned 6 rounds, cannot see for 4 further rounds, then dies of nerve damage.

[whswhs]

Originally Posted by evileeyore

An E crit chart on a Housekeeping roll, definitely serious:

Housekeeping/Kitchen Critical Table

GURPS does those with 3d6. Aside from style preference, that lets you put the horrific consequences out at 3, 4, 17, or 18, where they'll hardly ever happen, instead of making them just as likely as the trivial mishaps in the middle.

[Bruno]

I witnessed a real Housekeeping critical failure where I swear they rolled another 18 on the Housekeeping Critical Failure Table.
We had cleaners in, and there was this almighty crash from the kitchen and suddenly a lot of shouting. Apparently one of the cleaners had made the classic mistake of "Oh, i don't need a step stool, this will only take a moment. I'll just climb up on $thing."
In this case, $thing was "straight up the cabinet shelves", and the cabinet half off the wall, dumping the cleaner on the floor (fortunately, she suffered mostly a bruised ego).

In a game where this ever mattered, on a monthly job roll for Housekeeping, on a "verified critical failure" (ie, if you get a critical failure, roll again to see if you get a second critical failure) I would have a small amount of crushing, cutting, corrosion, toxic, or burning damage as a potential outcome. 1d-4 minimum 1?
Kitchen burns, exploding egg, cleaning product chemical injury, cut hands, things falling from high shelves or (like in this case) falling from someplace you probably shouldn't have been.

Worst case scenario (three critfails in a row?), you actually have a significant kitchen fire. Then you game it out as an adventuring situation as you try to put out the fire, or if that fails, evacuate everyone and save your important personal and financial documents before the house burns down.

One way to look at Housekeeping is that it's like a monthly hunter-gatherer Survival check, except for settled people with homes. Since living in a home is quite safe, a home counts as great equipment and therefore even bad results are automatically much less dangerous than living off the land.

[evileeyore]

Originally Posted by Bruno

One way to look at Housekeeping is that it's like a monthly hunter-gatherer Survival check, except for settled people with homes. Since living in a home is quite safe, a home counts as great equipment and therefore even bad results are automatically much less dangerous than living off the land.

I like this.

[roguebfl]

Originally Posted by whswhs

GURPS does those with 3d6. Aside from style preference, that lets you put the horrific consequences out at 3, 4, 17, or 18, where they'll hardly ever happen, instead of making them just as likely as the trivial mishaps in the middle.

the fact that it's labelled "E crit chart" means it deliberately mimicking the Rolemaster Critical chart style. where their would also be A, B, C, and D charts were E has the most horrific types

Basically some like

3 - E
4 - D
5 - D
6 - C
7 - C
8 - B
9 - B
10 - A
11 - A
12 - B
13 - B
14 - C
15 - C
16 - D
17 - D
18 - E

[whswhs]

Originally Posted by roguebfl

the fact that it's labelled "E crit chart" means it deliberately mimicking the Rolemaster Critical chart style. where their would also be A, B, C, and D charts were E has the most horrific types

I've never seen Rolemaster.

It's kind of odd to use this on a GURPS thread, where it can't be assumed that the audience will be familiar with a different game's conventions.

If you did this sort of thing in GURPS, each of A-E would in turn lead to a new 3d roll, not to percentile. Bringing in percentile is still stylistically alien.

[Phil Masters]

It is scientifically proven that the correct way to boil an egg is to be Zen about it, and not to boil the egg.

Originally Posted by evileeyore

An E crit chart on a Housekeeping roll, definitely serious:

Housekeeping/Kitchen Critical Table

Ah yes, that inspires flashbacks to my days of looking at Rolemaster critical tables and blinking in bemusement. Thank you.

[Anaraxes]

Originally Posted by roguebfl

deliberately mimicking the Rolemaster Critical chart style.

The especially disastrous nature of the lone 66 is also a signature.

[evileeyore]

Originally Posted by Phil Masters

Ah yes, that inspires flashbacks to my days of looking at Rolemaster critical tables and blinking in bemusement.

I still see them in my nightmares.

Thank you.

Your welcome. Any chance to scare young new roleplayers with our old guy war stories.

[roguebfl]

Originally Posted by whswhs

I've never seen Rolemaster.

It's kind of odd to use this on a GURPS thread, where it can't be assumed that the audience will be familiar with a different game's conventions.

However it was in quoted reply to Phil sounding like a Rolemaster critical failure

Originally Posted by whswhs

If you did this sort of thing in GURPS, each of A-E would in turn lead to a new 3d roll, not to percentile. Bringing in percentile is still stylistically alien.

Yes indeed but Rolemaster is a percentile based system from what I remember of it.