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Old 04-27-2017, 11:24 PM   #1191
PK
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Player: "I loot the bodies."

GM: "Their purses are tucked away and you're in a hurry, so roll Search."

<rolls an 18>

Player: "I can't find their stupid purses anywhere! I just don't get it! I've looked above the jangling underpants, I've looked below the jangling underpants -- nothing!"
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Old 04-27-2017, 11:30 PM   #1192
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

"You realize that our pet teddy* is going to terrify the whole village, right?"

"Oh yeah. They're all Neo-Catholics, right? I'll announce, 'It's okay, good people! God has blessed us with this holy creature who fights in His name!' "

"Are you trying to convince them that the teddy is Catholic?"

"She's too young to drink wine, but she drinks blood, so same thing."

<as Jesus> "Eat this flesh, it is my flesh. Drink this blood, it is my blood. It's just so much more efficient this way."


* A horribly mutated murder monster. Why they kept one as a pet, I'll never know.
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Old 04-28-2017, 11:44 PM   #1193
Mark Skarr
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

From our Teen Supers, New Generation game.

Matt made a comment about having Eidetic memory.
Duke (OOC): "Wow those are traits I wouldn’t want together?"
Matt (OOC): "What?"
Duke (OOC): "Being Rick Moranis as a Teenager and having Eidetic Memory."

-
Duke and Terry talking during their weight-training class.
Duke: "So, what do you do for fun?"
Terry: "Prove other people wrong."
Duke: "Oh, you play D&D too?"

-
Rio and Angel decide to go out dancing.
Matt (OOC): "It’s Buffy and Willow."
GM (OOC): "More like Willow and Dark Willow."

-
Duke is heading home and sees Matt poking around the parking lot.
GM (gesturing toward Matt): "You see this guy looking around."
Rio (OOC): "Searching for a wedgie."
Matt (OOC): "Well said."

-
Terry was explaining his machine telepathy ability.
Angel: "What, were you bitten by a radioactive microwave?"
Duke: "Can you get Netflix on my phone?"
Terry: "Yeah."
GM (OOC): "Nope! I was wrong." (Duke uses an iPhone 4--he's poor)
Rio (OOC): "Now it's more explosive than a Galaxy S7."

-
Terry tried to hijack a karaoke machine to search the internet.
Terry: “Nope!” (Rolled 18)
Duke (OOC): “And that’s how Videodrome starts!”

-
Angel (OOC): “From a distance he looks like a guy in a top hat and fur coat, but it’s really just rats.”

-
GM: “Apparently, the rats are following the Hercules rules: The less outnumbered they are, the more skilled their opponents are.”

-
Raven: “I’ll take the bracelet back.”
Renn: “Are you sure you want to do that—you’re a little conspicuous.”
GM (OOC): “Says the guy dressed as an extra from Sweeny Todd.

(Rio and Raven are the same person, just Rio is her normal appearance, and Raven is her Alter Ego.)

-
Renn: “If you want me to take a look [at your injury] I can. I’m a . . .”
Teo (OOC): “I stayed at a Holiday Inn Express, last night.”

-
Raven: “Some of us can talk to animals.”
Duke: “You just keep getting weirder.”

-
Matt: "What's this obsession with the [broken, antique] mirror?"
Rio: “Because I’m magic, and I’m concerned that the mirror could be cursed.”
GM (OOC?): “Not anymore.”

Last edited by Mark Skarr; 04-28-2017 at 11:47 PM. Reason: Clarify situation
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Old 04-29-2017, 10:37 AM   #1194
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mark Skarr View Post
From our Teen Supers, New Generation game.

GM: “Apparently, the rats are following the Hercules rules: The less outnumbered they are, the more skilled their opponents are.”

I've seen that called the Conservation of Ninjutsu.
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Old 04-30-2017, 10:09 AM   #1195
David Johnston2
 
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

"If you're dead can I search your pockets for loot?"

Undead character: "No."
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Old 04-30-2017, 03:02 PM   #1196
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

GUMMI RABBIT: "How many senses do you have?"

FAIRY MOUSE: "More than five, but fewer than ten."

GUMMI RABBIT: "Can you be more specific?"

FAIRY MOUSE: "For me, scent and hearing are a single sense. Beyond what I've been informed are the standard five for humans, I also have a sense for mana levels and enchanted items, sense of humor, and four-dimensional sense of touch. There might be some others."
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Old 04-30-2017, 05:10 PM   #1197
Fred Brackin
 
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

"So Krak out of today's loot you have chosen a scale model of Castle Ravenloft and a figurine of a weasel carved from amber. Why?

"Krak raised by wolves. Not have good toys when child. Only bones and have to fight other wolves for those."
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Old 05-02-2017, 07:49 PM   #1198
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

City Priestess: "I've noticed as that as an experienced merchant and sailor you're the best merchant this town has."

Foreign Merchant: "Your town does not own me"
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Old 05-03-2017, 08:31 PM   #1199
PK
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

(Out of character quote.)

Me: "So [player's] new Dungeon Fantasy character is a holy warrior of an Aztec god of love. It's a neat mix because she's got great social and seduction skills, but can also kick enough butt to be a front-line fighter."

My wife: "If you can't lay 'em, slay 'em!"

(My wife is amazing.)
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Old 05-04-2017, 01:50 AM   #1200
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

PK: I envy you your wife. She sounds like a hoot. :)

(Also, I had a similar idea once, Paladin of Inanna/Ishtar, Sumerian/Akkadian goddess of love and war, but my D&D group couldn't believe I wanted to take both Charm and War domains. Or maybe it was trouble reconciling Ishtar with "Lawful Good"....)
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