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Old 09-23-2017, 09:08 PM   #1261
cvannrederode
 
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

A younger player has a brand new, uber-melee character with a skill he can't use/wouldn't have. The GM tells him to switch it for something that will help with operating the space ship:

Mandalorian: "Take Gunner-Beams."
Blade: "No. I have incompetence with ranged weapons."
Mandalorian: "Fine, take piloting. I'll man a turret."
Blade: "Okay, that I can do, because I do have [working] eyes."
Everyone looks at the blind Jedi who insists we should let him pilot the ship.

Earlier in the game, an ex-acquaintance that we had left at the Jedi Temple with only one leg, shows up as the pilot of one of the five starfighters that greeted us at Nar-Shadda. With both legs. And acting smug (we did take his ship). Then the stuff hits the fan at the temple, and he might have been to blame.

Mandalorian: "I take the ship as close to Coruscant's sun as it can survive, at full speed toward the sun. Then I drag the prisoner into the airlock and open the door."
Prisoner: "You're not going to do what I thin...."
Mandalorian: "Yup!" and boots the guy out the airlock. Then about faces the ship and hyperdrives away.

Last edited by cvannrederode; 09-23-2017 at 09:14 PM.
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Old 10-01-2017, 11:43 PM   #1262
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

"They attacked me! They attacked my little elf friend here! It was elf defense!"
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Old 10-09-2017, 06:35 AM   #1263
Mark Skarr
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Hana: “How did this come up?”
Toni: “Well, my AI suggested it.”
Hana: “You . . . have . . . an . . . AI?”
Toni: “Well, originally, I had several. I’d made a few to streamline various projects, and I created an overseer AI to manage all of them. Recently, it decided that the most efficient thing it could do was subsume all of the other AI function into itself . . . oh, God, I’ve created the MCP.”
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Old 10-11-2017, 06:11 PM   #1264
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

We're trying to resuscitate a severely wounded NPC (Olivia), and our crusader hears the beating of angel wings.

Mike (Crusader): Can I tell which one?
GM: Samael, he collects souls.
Mike (Crusader): ... do I still have my soul? Does Olivia still have her soul?
Agravain: Or does she kick him in the dick and tell him to go away?
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Old 10-11-2017, 07:04 PM   #1265
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

GM: We're not having a car wash called Holy Rollers.
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Old 10-11-2017, 07:10 PM   #1266
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Stephanie: "Do you have any kids?"
Luna (a woman): "None that I know of."
Stephanie (Blinks, looks confused).
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Old 10-12-2017, 04:40 PM   #1267
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mark Skarr View Post
Stephanie: "Do you have any kids?"
Luna (a woman): "None that I know of."
Stephanie (Blinks, looks confused).
Oh, that is classic. :)
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Old 10-12-2017, 06:42 PM   #1268
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Kevin: "The mana level got all twisty. All of the grain in all of the silos in Hanist just turned to grapes. Which is okay for now, we like grapes, but, uh."
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Old 10-14-2017, 12:51 PM   #1269
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

This quote may have been a turning point in a recent campaign. This was a dressing-down that a PC Nancy Drew/Veronica Mars-type investigator got from an uncle on the police force.

The character, a college student named Jasmine, had gotten a text message from a detective asking for a late-night meeting in the park about the murder they were working on. She raced to the site immediately, without telling anyone or taking precautions. It turned out the detective had been attacked, the phone had been stolen, the message was a fake, and Jasmine was quickly surrounded at gunpoint and abducted ... the only reasons she wasn't killed right away was that no one wanted the park police to interrupt, and that they wanted to send a message to her uncle.

She survived partly from her own tenacity, and partly from some luck related to police and vigilante interference. And once she and the uncle were alone, Jasmine got the following lecture. The player subsequently used it as justification to buy off her Overconfidence disadvantage.

"Right now, I want you to remember one more lesson. A big one.
"Criminals cheat.
"They do not play fair.
"They will lie. They will trick. They will outnumber if they can. They will outgun if they can. They will not stand up in neat little rows for you to knock them down.
"They do not see you as a human being. They will rob you. Rape you. Kill you. They will break your spirit if they can. If they can't, they will still break your body if you let them.
"And they will have no fear of hurting people you love if they can't get you.
"They have done it before. They will do it again any time someone gives them a chance.
"Damn right they're compensating. So what?
"You have to be smarter. Tougher. More careful. And even then, it's no guarantee.
"Because this city does not care. It does not care about fair. It does not care about right. It does not care about you.
"If you care about any of those things, you have to fight for them. And you never, ever count on getting them for free.
"You are luckier than you know.
"I should have found a lot more than a wallet at the park."
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Old 10-14-2017, 02:48 PM   #1270
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

GM: “A strange noise blares through the ship.”
Teo: “What was that?”
Raven: “French Horns.” (SFW You Tube link)
Teo: “No no no. Before that!”
Raven: “An alarm! They know we’re here!”
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