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Old 06-23-2020, 04:18 AM   #1
Anders
 
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Default Silly spells for all games

Melf's Miniature Minotaurs

2nd level Conjuration

This spell summons 1d6 miniature minotaurs, with AC 14 and 6 HP. Although they do have axes, they mostly bite the feet of their enemies, with a +1 bonus to hit and doing 1d4 damage. They are not under the wizard's control, but will attack anything in the vicinity.

Detect Fire

Divination cantrip

Touch range.
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Old 06-23-2020, 06:10 AM   #2
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Default Re: Silly spells for all games

A list of misspells was created for The Fanstasy Trip kickstarter. It's hard to pick a favorite from among them.
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Old 06-23-2020, 02:03 PM   #3
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Default Re: Silly spells for all games

The classic version of this is to take a group of spells that act a substance that matters and substitute a silly one. The classic GURPS Elemental College of Cheese, or the recent bit of thread we had on the College of Staples for example. A old variant from I think Dragonquest took rewrote the set of spells aimed at demons and substituted kittens. Though I dunno, given the debate of the lethality of housecats in D&D, there might be games where Amulet of Protection from Kittens is a useful spell.
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Old 06-23-2020, 02:11 PM   #4
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Default Re: Silly spells for all games

Quote:
Originally Posted by Anders View Post
Detect Fire

Divination cantrip

Touch range.
That's similar to Detect Normal Fires, from the April 1989 Dragon, which was an all-time classic. The material component was a half-pint of lamp oil, which you poured over your hand while casting the spell. The full list was:
Quote:
Find Terrain; Explosive Familiar; Invisible Runes; Wizard's Stalker; Bigby's Interposing Eye; Remove Hand; Audible Curse; Hallucinatory Glamer; Burning Mouth; Locate Hands; Detect Object; Feign Invisibility; Drawmij's Instant Death; Magic Summons; Speak With Mud; Charm Dead; Water Plant; Stone Breathing; Affect Shape; Detect Normal Fires; Wall of Evil; Transmute Rock to Stone; Wall of Missiles; Minor Globe of Iron; Monster Invulnerability; Fools Summoning III; Protection From Normal Gold.
Feign Invisibility actually has uses, mostly in theatrical performance. It convinces everyone that you are actually invisible, but they can nonethless see you.
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Old 06-23-2020, 08:07 PM   #5
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Default Re: Silly spells for all games

Recursion

Summons paper, writing implements, polyhedral decision-makers, and assorted books. It produces everything needed for a full night of immersive escapism including a pre-written adventure for the caster to guide the party through in the theater of their imagination.
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Old 06-23-2020, 08:14 PM   #6
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Default Re: Silly spells for all games

Flyerball: creates a large number of flyers flying in a all directions.

Wall of mice: creates an obstruction made of rodents
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Old 06-23-2020, 09:26 PM   #7
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Default Re: Silly spells for all games

Magic Missal (clerical)

Creates a book containing the texts needed for preparing a chosen religious ceremony. Can be read by any literate being.
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Old 06-24-2020, 12:58 AM   #8
WaterAndWindSpirit
 
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Default Re: Silly spells for all games

Bread Weapons isn't that silly. You just need Aura for it to work, but if you do? You have quite the deadly bludgeon...

Store Flesh is also good, unless you're a warforged, you need food, and food shortages were quite the problem in medieval times (and even today in poorer regions.).

Quote:
Originally Posted by malloyd View Post
A old variant from I think Dragonquest took rewrote the set of spells aimed at demons and substituted kittens. Though I dunno, given the debate of the lethality of housecats in D&D, there might be games where Amulet of Protection from Kittens is a useful spell.
Didn't Nanoha have to deal with a magic gem that made a normal kitten grow really, really tall? If an enlarged kitten doesn't know it's new strength, and you're a cat lover, you need some protective options beyond "just kill the kitten".

Even silly spells have their uses if you're creative enough. I think the Dresden Files RPG has a character who can see through drywall. Go on any R6S forum and ask if they'd like this power.

Last edited by WaterAndWindSpirit; 06-24-2020 at 01:07 AM.
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Old 06-24-2020, 06:53 AM   #9
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Default Re: Silly spells for all games

Dramatic Entrance is a Dazzle-type spell that momentarily draws every eye to the user; halos, sparkles, or showers of flower petals (on mysterious breezes) optional.

Background Music is a detection charm. As long as it is in effect, the user get cues to the immediate environment (including otherwise hidden events or intentions) in audible form. Of course, everyone else around the user can hear it, too, making stealth impossible. The Headphones variant avoids this drawback, but substitutes Poor Hearing.
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Old 06-24-2020, 08:41 AM   #10
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Default Re: Silly spells for all games

Bubble Hell: Fills a 1,000 cf volume with soap bubbles. Blocks line of sight until bubbles dissipate naturally (about 1 minute; less with vigorous activity). May extinguish small fires. May be harmful to water-bodied creatures (undines, etc.). Residue useful for cleaning.

God's Love: Clerical version, which substitutes beer foam for soap bubbles. Flammable. Leaves a sticky residue.
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