Memorable Quotes.

[Koshka]

An OOC conversation in a Champions game. For those who don't play it, skill rolls are done with 3 six-sided dice.

Player 1: I failed, I got a 19.
Player 2: You can't get 19 on three dice.
Player 1: I can!

[Chunk]

The Party
Brother Cudfayl: a good-hearted Cleric of Esham, God of Law. (Me)
Tyrvin Garnet: a Gnome Mage. Cheerful, whimsical, suffers from an insatiable curiousity. (Simon)
Jarek Ravenlock: a Fighter/Thief. Seemingly quiet and driven, he carries a great iron sword. (Juliano)
Izhtaza: female High Elf Ranger beautiful, enigmatic and a bit of a closed book. (my wife)
Otto Proudfoot: a stout (!) Halfling Fighter; a doughty cook, warrior and drinker! (Lesley)
Himone: another Elf Ranger, from the far north; a highly skilled tracker and consummate archer. (Tim)
Krull The Barbyturate: a Barbarian Warrior; very proud of his enormous weapon! (Paul)

The Scene
It was an AD&D game being run at our games club. Our party had been asked to escort a cleric of the Forest Goddess to an ancient chapel in the woods.
As we travelled, we came across the eviscerated body of the local herbalist. Said herbalist had been flayed alive, impaled on a branch some 20 feet up, then disembowelled and his entrails wrapped around the trunk of said tree.

The Quote
Izhtaza: "That doesn't look like a yellow ribbon to me."

The game stopped dead for about 5 minutes whilst the GM stopped choking on his beer at this point.

[Blood Legend]

Shall largely go unexplained: "Oh come on! how many times does a prop plane drive into a field of sleeping cows."

[al_kenobi]

Originally Posted by Chunk[b

The Quote[/b]
Izhtaza: "That doesn't look like a yellow ribbon to me."

The game stopped dead for about 5 minutes whilst the GM stopped choking on his beer at this point.

Renting the clubhouse - $15.00
12-Pack of beer - $6.00
Making your GM choke on said beer with a well timed line - PRICELESS

[BLloyd607502]

(During a Fantasy Norse game. We were playing Vikings and had managed to make our way into the temple of Thor through a back enterance, we were there to Steal Mjolnir from his private quarters (Gods had immortal earth bound bodies). We managed to sneak into his quarters and grab Mjolnir, as we were about to leave his quarters someone tried to enter through the front door.

PC1: Oh Sh...everyone in here *Dives through a door*
GM: ...Right you're in what appears to be a steam room *Smile*.
PC2: Right, I yell through the door to whoever is coming in "Don't come in...I'm...er...in the Steam room!"
GM: ...A voice replies "Yes M' Lord, we are here for your orders, what are we to do about the Geats who are infringing upon the southern borders?
PC2: (Whispers to the other PCs) What shall I tell them!
PC3: Er...umm...What would Thor Do?
PC4: I don't know, what would that Drunken, violent, womanizer of a God Do?
PC1: ...Get Hammered?
Everyone: *General laughter*
GM:...*Barely holding back laughter*
PC2: ...*Throught the door* Give me a hour or so, let me have a nice quiet Soak for a bit.
GM: ...er...Sir...you always give out orders in the Steam room.
PC2: ...Well I'm feeling Ill today and I can't think Straight so give me a hour.
GM: ...Er...Right...Yes Sir *Sound of a Door closing* *Huge smile on his face*
PC1: Yes! Score!...I cannot belive that we're getting away with this, I mean, honestly I thought he would at least leave some security on his room when he's out.
PC2: Heh, probably passed out in a gutter somewhere after drinking too much.
*GM breaks down laughing, pointing at a little bit of writing on his notes, PC1 leans over and looks at the little bit of writing (With his permission) and then goes pale*
PC1:...No way...
GM: A voice comes from in the Steam "...Am I" And Thor Steps out into View.
Everyone: ............Oh S***
PC1: RUN!
GM: *Shows everyone his notes he wrote the day before, Right in the steamroom is a little X with 'Thor in bath' written on it.*
Surprisingly we did manage to escape alive. Some of us lost limbs but oh well.

[knarf]

The party has just entered an ancient genetics lab and encountered guards who are genetically engineered telepaths who are mind-controlling giant raptors and using them for mounts. The PCs manage to incapacitate one of the guards and knock him off of his mount. The dinosaur's instincts started to reassert themselves, frightening everyone.

One of the more flamboyant characters volunteered to keep this new menace under control. He asked the other guard "How do you stop this thing?"

The guard returned "Can you touch its' mind?"

"I can touch its' soul."

At this point, the character proceeded to distract the raging raptor with interpretive dance while the party alien telepath used his own powers to regain control of the beast.

[brian_smaller]

GM: As you put your foot down the flagstone underneath it slides downwards. You hear a click.

Player: I lift my foot and wait to see what happens.

GM: A 10ton slab of stone falls on you. You found the trap.

[Bruno]

From tonights online session (still ongoing):

Connell: "What gold?"
Mrugnak: "Der guys in der bar say dese guys dat wot was here had gold n stuff."
Mrugnak: "But den dey bad druids an dese wolfs come and make dem go way an den der gold got lost."
Mordreona: "I recall that too Mrugnak."
Lenia: "That's the sanctified regalia, Mrugnak. That stays with the druids."
Mordreona: "Why do they get to keep the gold?"
Connell: "Because it's holy. Holy gold stays with the holy people."
Mordreona: "I'm not sure I buy that."
Mordreona: "That is to say if thats true when we have it it is not holy any more."
Connell: "Chances are if you steal holy gold, you end up cursed. Suppurating boils, hair in uncomfortable places, sudden teeth. Druids can be very creative."
Mrugnak: "Mrugnak gots hair everywhere."
Mordreona: "Now thats a good point."
Berkun: "What if he'd lose all the hair, then?"
Mordreona: "Then when I lick him it would tast better for sure."
Connell: "I... did not know you and Mrugnak had that kind of relationship."
** Mrugnak blinks. **
** Mrugnak looks totally confused. **

I'm not sure he knew they had "that kind" of relationship either.


Backround - Berkun is an archer.

Lenia: "Hey, Berkun."
Lenia: "Just how far can you reach out and touch things at?"
Berkun: "Reach out?"
Lenia: "How far does your bow shoot?"
Berkun: "As long as my ha... oh!"

[Blood Legend]

To a character attempting to read a note his dying father had passed on to him. He's illiterate.

Roland: I take it and look over the strange symbols.
GM: They're strange. And symbolic.

[Cybrludite]

Background: GURPS Cyberpunk game. Due to it being Mardi Gras season IRL, and the shop we were playing at being on the back side of a parade route, we were gaming at a Starbucks. The PCs are in New Jersey, looking for some mircrochip templates stolen from a courier by a hooker. Said hooker has gone missing. They trace her down only to discover that she's the latest victim of a serial killer know as the Harvester of Eyes. I quietly (we're in a Mundane location, after all) describe how she's appears to have been slowly flayed alive and had her eyes plucked out.

Chuck, playing the group's techie, loudly blurts out, "HOLY ****! HE SKINNED THE ****ING HOOKER ALIVE!" In the middle of a Starbucks. In the middle of a crowded Starbucks.

Me: (Giving the "migraine salute") Chuck, did you really need to shout that?
Chuck: Well, it was in character.
Me: Yes. Yes it was. However, you could have simply said, "My character shouts, 'Holy ****! He skinned the ****ing hooker alive!'" instead of actually shouting it in a room full of mundanes.