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Old 02-29-2020, 05:57 PM   #1561
Icelander
 
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Teddy Smith: "What location for a tattoo best represents anonymity?"
Lacoste (OOC): "Tramp stamp?"
GM: "I can see that. I bet there is a correlation between tweens with tramp stamps and the ones who end up with their picture on the back of a milk cartoon."

---

Teddy Smith: "We can't just use some other girl as the ringer. What if the cultists do trace her magical signature to the ringer?"
Lacoste: "Garza can't do it, she has to cover for us with her bosses at the US Marshals Service. What about somebody from the Penemue security staff? They're professional close protection specialists, good enough to protect Kessler."
Teddy Smith: "But not good enough for the 'Night Rider' teams. Besides, it doesn't do us any good for the ringer to stay on board Penemue. We need her to draw any cultists away from us, not provoke a bombing or something."
Lacoste: "You're right. Who do we talk to to find us a pig?"

GM: "Far be it from me to interrupt a cunning plan in the making, but are you aware that there actually is a living chicken aboard Penemue and the use of chickens to substitue for a person is well established in magical tradition?"
Lacoste (OOC): What's wrong with you?"
GM: "Don't want to play into stereotypes by sacrificing a chicken?"
Lacoste (OCC): "It's not chicken sacrifice that bothers me. Are you really suggesting that we tattoo a chicken? Surely you can see how weird that would be?"
Teddy Smith (OOC): "There is no way I'm plucking a live chicken to tattoo it. It's not on."
GM: "This is the line you're going to draw in the sand? Tattooing chickens is weird, but putting a pig in a dress and a wig before you put lipstick on it and tattoo a tramp stamp on it is a perfectly reasonable plan?
Lacoste (OOC): "Who said anything about lipstick?"
Smith (OOC): "Yeah, this is not a sexual thing. We're not weirdos."

Ramon Alejo Reyes Jr., First Steward of Penemue: "How heavy a pig would sir be requiring?"
Lacoste: "I don't know. Small, I guess."
Teddy Smith: "As close to 115 lbs. as you can manage. A sow, young. I don't know if you can get a housebroken one."
Lacoste: "Won't need to be housebroken; on account of the diaper."
Reyes: "Very good, sir."

Lacoste (OOC): "So we're really doing this. There's a guy going to be driving a pig around the United States?"
Smith (OOC): "Not a guy. Guys. It's a two man job."
GM: "Three, I should think. Driver, security and a guy to hold the pig. In the wig."
Lacoste (OOC): "So, three hard-bitten ex-spec ops types are going to be driving a pig with a wig, dressed like a woman, around the US in a classic car, while pursued by sorcerous death cultists?"
GM: "That certainly seems to be your plan."
Lacoste (OOC): "I'd watch that movie."
GM: "Driving Miss Piggy?"
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Last edited by Icelander; 02-29-2020 at 06:43 PM.
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Old 03-01-2020, 06:08 AM   #1562
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Icelander View Post
Lacoste (OOC): "I'd watch that movie."
GM: "Driving Miss Piggy?"
The campaign needs to feature occasional reports from the Driving Miss Piggy team. If she starts re-reading Dune and making progress with the Bene Gesserit exercises, worry.
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Old 03-01-2020, 06:20 AM   #1563
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The campaign needs to feature occasional reports from the Driving Miss Piggy team. If she starts re-reading Dune and making progress with the Bene Gesserit exercises, worry.
The pig?

I'd worry if the pig started reading anything, really.

I'm actually staffing the 'Driving Miss Piggy' team now. Tomasz Mateusz Wojciechowski, a former GROM operator and French Foreign Legionnaire just coming up on sixty is going to be on it, as will Zamal Juman, a former Guyanese policeman from a very murky unit who is in his mid-fifties. I'm going to need a younger 'Night Rider' for the more embarrassing duties involved, but all the ones stationed at Penemue and/or already mentioned are either busy or can't leave because the authorities are going to want to speak to them some more.

I'll probably have to name and detail one of the other part-time 'Night Riders' who responded to Kessler's call-up two days ago and is just now making it into town. Probably someone recently out of US Special Operations Forces (SOF), like the SEALs or Green Berets, likely in his early thirties.
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Last edited by Icelander; 03-01-2020 at 06:25 AM.
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Old 03-01-2020, 07:46 AM   #1564
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I'd worry if the pig started reading anything, really.
Consider: much of the magical identity of "Gwen" is being transferred to the pig, and that's entangled with her imagination and reading habits, as shown by the ASN dream-quest.
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Old 03-01-2020, 08:03 AM   #1565
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Consider: much of the magical identity of "Gwen" is being transferred to the pig, and that's entangled with her imagination and reading habits, as shown by the ASN dream-quest.
That's not unfair, I suppose.

Though it would be a pretty impressive side-effect if a Path of Magic ritual meant to transfer magical residue and aura would also change mental makeup, even without a Path of Mind component, let alone one powerful enough to create sapient pigs.

Although it's certainly something that might creep in as a quirk of the ritual, albeit probably more subtly than a pig with intelligence anywhere approaching a human.

Relevant comments from players:

Lacoste (OOC): "What if she starts to recover her memories and performing nasty-bad rituals while she's in the safehouse?"
Teddy Smith (OOC): "That's why I'm going with her. And also because she freaks out if I ever leave her sight."
Lacoste (OOC): "But you can't be stuck babysitting! I wanted us to have police procedural adventures, catching cultists and serial killers!"
Smith (OOC): "You'll have 200+ actual federal, state and local police who really do have investigative skills to do that with. I'm good at shooting things, not building cases that stand up in court."
Lacoste (OOC): "I might need things shot."
Smith (OOC): "Then maybe I'll have gotten her adjusted to the point I can leave for a couple of hours, to shoot people or things, as appropriate."
Lacoste (OOC): "We should just kill her. No Girl, no prophecy, no world-ending ritual. If we were bad guys, we'd kill her."
Smith (OOC): "If we were even a smidgen less Good Guys, we'd kill her For the Greater Good."
Lacoste (OOC): "We could leave her by the side of the road. It wouldn't technically be murder."
Smith (OOC): "No, but what if the cult just captures her alive?"
Lacoste (OOC): "Fine, I'm changing my vote back to murder."
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Old 03-01-2020, 10:06 AM   #1566
johndallman
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Originally Posted by Icelander View Post
Although it's certainly something that might creep in as a quirk of the ritual, albeit probably more subtly than a pig with intelligence anywhere approaching a human.
Just watch out for the pig developing kaleidoscope eyes.

In any case, if this trick does any good, and the cultists catch up with the distraction, their anger should be wonderful.
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Old 03-01-2020, 12:53 PM   #1567
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

The 30-something SEAL (or even a SEAL-wannabe) should be named Kermit, if only for the IC laughs.
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Old 03-01-2020, 01:09 PM   #1568
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Icelander View Post
Lacoste (OOC): "So we're really doing this. There's a guy going to be driving a pig around the United States?"
Smith (OOC): "Not a guy. Guys. It's a two man job."
GM: "Three, I should think. Driver, security and a guy to hold the pig. In the wig."
Lacoste (OOC): "So, three hard-bitten ex-spec ops types are going to be driving a pig with a wig, dressed like a woman, around the US in a classic car, while pursued by sorcerous death cultists?"
GM: "That certainly seems to be your plan."
Lacoste (OOC): "I'd watch that movie."
GM: "Driving Miss Piggy?"
I can absolutely see that as a mostly slice-of-life episode of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.
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Old 03-01-2020, 01:18 PM   #1569
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Icelander View Post
Lacoste (OOC): "So we're really doing this. There's a guy going to be driving a pig around the United States?"
Smith (OOC): "Not a guy. Guys. It's a two man job."
GM: "Three, I should think. Driver, security and a guy to hold the pig. In the wig."
Lacoste (OOC): "So, three hard-bitten ex-spec ops types are going to be driving a pig with a wig, dressed like a woman, around the US in a classic car, while pursued by sorcerous death cultists?"
GM: "That certainly seems to be your plan."
Lacoste (OOC): "I'd watch that movie."
GM: "Driving Miss Piggy?"
I have some characters that would feel this is not the strangest thing they've been asked to do.

And, in the case of my sister's character, Shadow Foe, he had to explain once: "Look, I'm just here to carry the goat."
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Old 03-01-2020, 01:51 PM   #1570
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Default Re: Memorable Quotes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by johndallman View Post
Just watch out for the pig developing kaleidoscope eyes.

In any case, if this trick does any good, and the cultists catch up with the distraction, their anger should be wonderful.
Tomasz Wojciechowski was a child prodigy (of almost everything, but perhaps most notably chess) who dropped out of med school just before graduation due to student unrest in his native Poland. He has since spent most of his life as an unconventional, but exceptionally effective, special operator.

Zamal Juman was part of a paramilitary police death squad in a very ugly undeclared war in Guyana and has spent the past twelve years in an intelligence billet in Kessler's 'Night Riders'. He may not have the phenomenal fitness of the younger operators, but ever since he was young, he's lived in a greyscale world of danger, counter-surveillance, murder and betrayal.

Whoever is picked to supplement them will be, at minimum, a Navy SEAL or other similar special operator who is unusual even among his peers in terms of willpower and mental toughness.

When you consider that the 'Driving Miss Piggy' team has a mandate to call in a strike team (federal LEOs or 'Night Riders' depending on situation) to ambush their pursuers if they detect cultists, I'm not sure that anyone who finds them will have much of a chance to rue the fact that their target is more porcine than prophetic.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Phantasm View Post
The 30-something SEAL (or even a SEAL-wannabe) should be named Kermit, if only for the IC laughs.
If there is even one Kermit among Kessler's part-time 'Night Riders', I'm sure Wojciechowski will ask for him by name. I'm not sure, however, that it is particularly likely. I guess someone could be named after President Roosevelt's son.

Quote:
Originally Posted by William View Post
I can absolutely see that as a mostly slice-of-life episode of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mark Skarr View Post
I have some characters that would feel this is not the strangest thing they've been asked to do.

And, in the case of my sister's character, Shadow Foe, he had to explain once: "Look, I'm just here to carry the goat."
The funny/tragic thing about it is that this job is assigned to NPCs. The PCs have better things to do than piggysit the ringer.

This scenario is part of my ongoing occult mystery / paranormal technothriller / Monster Hunter campaign, Caribbean by Night. In fact, I've just posted in the campaign thread asking for input on where the three NPCs should drive Miss Piggy.

I'd love suggestions from as many people as possible.

Lucien Lacoste's player asked me if I could write a short story about the adventures of the 'Driving Miss Piggy' team...
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