[Gold & Appel Inc]

Many, many moons ago when I was an obnoxious 13-year-old running one of my first DND campaigns, one of the players really, really wanted an intelligent magical sword for some reason, so I let him find one. Its name was Cuthbert, and it was normal-looking except for having a human-sized eyeball at the tip with the normal vulnerability of one to physical harm. Cuthbert could talk, and protested piteously against attempts to use him as a weapon (or cram him into a normal-width sheath). He could also read minds, but after many attempts to discover his "combat bonus" through trial and error, he mostly used this to humiliate the PCs until they first attempted to sell him, and failing that chucked him into a ravine. He reappeared some time later in the hands of a diabolical enemy, to whom he cheerfully spilled dirt on the PCs upon recognizing them.